Everybody is wrong about Troy Aikman and Jack Buck

Gee whiz, nobody on the right or left seems to understand a good sarcastic comment when they hear it.

Here’s a transcript of the event from the article by World Net Daily.

The remarks came Sunday during the broadcast of the game between the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Green Bay Packers at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Florida.

After several U.S. military aircraft flew over the stadium, Aikman, a former Dallas Cowboys quarterback, said: “That’s a lot of jet fuel just to do a little flyover.”

Buck chimed in with, “That’s YOUR hard-earned money and your tax dollars at work.”

“That stuff ain’t happening with the Kamala-Biden ticket, I’ll tell you that right now, partner,” Aikman responded…

NFL legend and network broadcaster mock military flyover at football game

In the past 24 hours I’ve heard all sorts of people from Rush Limbaugh to sports talking heads try to chime in on this brief set of comments heard via a supposedly “open microphone.” Without exception, they all got it wrong. Limbaugh danced around the correct interpretation (almost deliberately so), but he missed it just as badly as Armstrong and Getty did this morning. The sports talk show I heard while at my doctor’s appointment today was off the mark also.

Folks, the understanding is really simple if you understand the context of the remarks.

First, these comments are made at an NFL game. You know, the place where players kneel for the national anthem—a huge sign of disdain and disrespect for our country. NFL games are often not even broadcasting the national anthem and/or players hide in the locker room until it is over before taking the field. The NFL has made it plain to all that it hates America and sports is now political because a vocal few in their midst hate President Trump.

Second, everyone keeps getting thrown off the trail by the money comment. They want to take it literally and when they do, they are off on a rabbit trail to nowhere. Folks the money comment is the context clue that this comment and what is about to transpire is sarcasm. Everybody seems to miss this point.

Aikman “That’s a lot of jet fuel just to do a little flyover.”
Buck “That’s YOUR hard-earned money and your tax dollars at work.”
Aikman delivers the zinger… “That stuff ain’t happening with the Kamala-Biden ticket, I’ll tell you that right now, partner.”

Aikman’s punchline sadly fell on deaf ears.

The point of the exchange is that as much as the Democrats hate America, we won’t see such displays of patriotism under a Harris-Biden Administration. Oh, Harris before Biden is another context clue that this is sarcasm. It’s really a backhanded slam of the Democrats and the NFL because of their lack of patriotism.

Oh, and this wasn’t an open mike mistake, it was only regarded as that because neither guy was talking directly into the microphone.

I’m glad someone in the sports world is taking a shot at professional sports and the political party which has decided that repudiating America and what it stands for is a winning strategy.

Folks, once you realize the comment is sarcasm then you can enjoy it for the spontaneity and humor that it was intended to convey.

ESPN Deems Black Anchor “Not Black Enough”

BY Chief

Disney Corporation sports subsidiary ESPN made headlines again for all the wrong reasons earlier this week. ESPN has a blog on its website called “The Undefeated.” It’s for blacks, by blacks, about race topics etc. Honestly, I do not have a huge issue with it, even though some of the writers like Malcolm Metcalf have an obvious racial bias against white people. It is usually off to the side of the website, and never really made a focal point. However, controversy has been stirred up and it’s a doozy.

The Undefeated was going to air a race focused special called “Time for a change, we won’t be defeated.” The special would feature ESPN personalities, Jay Harris, Michael Eves, Maria Taylor, and Elle Duncan. Suspiciously missing from the list is Sage Steele. I say suspicious because she hosts the flagship show “SportsCenter” during prime time and is one of their more visible hosts. Steele was upset, and understandably so. Here are some snippets from the Wall Street Journal article about her expressing her disappointment.

ESPN anchor Sage Steele has told management she believes she was excluded from a special the network aired on race last month because she wasn’t considered by certain Black colleagues to be an authentic voice for the Black community, a person familiar with the matter said.

Ms. Steele, one of the network’s most prominent on-air personalities, voiced her concerns to ESPN President Jimmy Pitaro in early June, saying the incident showed the network has a divisive work environment, the person said.

Ms. Steele said colleagues told her she was considered for the special by the executive in charge, Michael Fountain, until two of the other on-air personalities involved, Elle Duncan and Michael Eaves, complained, saying Ms. Steele wouldn’t be accepted by what they considered the Black community, according to the person familiar with her account to management.

Sage Steele claims she was excluded from ESPN race special thanks to colleagues complaints

So, let me, as a middle age white man ask, how is someone not an authentic voice for the black community? In addition, how is a black person, Steele as shown in the photo is black, not accepted by her own community? Well Steele answered that question for me, she burns “The Mouse” pretty badly with her response….

Sage Steel–deemed not black enough by ESPN

“I found it sad for all of us that any human being should be allowed to define someone’s ‘Blackness.’ Growing up biracial in America with a Black father and a white mother, I have felt the inequities that many, if not all Black and biracial people have felt—being called a monkey, the ‘n’ word, having ape sounds made as I walked by—words and actions that all of us know sting forever. Most importantly, trying to define who is and isn’t Black enough goes against everything we are fighting for in this country, and only creates more of a divide.”

Well as an outsider looking in, no shock there, you cannot be black in this country unless both parents are black, live in the hood, don’t have a good job, and are on some form of assistance. Actually, I would have enjoyed hearing her perspective, she also has interviewed scores of athletes over the years and I’m sure her rolodex of contacts are huge. Seems like a no brainer to me.

Well the truth is ESPN brass doesn’t like Steele for her political opinions, she has said she doesn’t feel comfortable speaking about BLM, she spoke out against folks not standing for the national anthem, and made waves for tweeting her disappointment about protestors blocking airports due to Trump’s anti-immigration order. While she doesn’t come off as political, if you don’t tow the party line, you are part of the problem.

In that regard, Eves and Duncan are perfect, just like Joe Biden, neither have any beliefs; instead, they just parrot what is put in front of them on the teleprompter. In speaking to a couple of cable watching friends of mine, all of them said Eaves is an empty suit who really has no role at ESPN, and Duncan is pretty much useless. The ratings they draw likely are composed of mostly of drunks who pass out with their TV left on.

My main question is how come Disney gets a pass time and time again? No one is writing about this, only small anecdotes here and there. Which is funny because with today’s cancel culture, how come their founder gets a pass? He was a devoted racist even putting his views in black and white and technicolor! Disney is in deep trouble financially. I am sure their theme parks will finally re-open someday. Meanwhile, they get to host the NBA games later this month.

Sage Steele, if I was you, Fox has a growing sports network called FS1 they could use someone like yourself. Leave the mouse.

The Chief

ESPN Employee Melts Down

By Chief

2020, the year journalism and humanity officially died. The day was July 7th and Senator Josh Hawley of Missouri sent off a letter to NBA commissioner Adam Silver regarding the words that players would be allowed to wear on their jerseys when the league restarts. Basically, the league is allowing only certain sayings on the jerseys–all of which have some tie to the BLM movement. Hawley was simply inquiring as to why a player couldn’t wear a pro law enforcement slogan. Enter complete retard Adrian Wojnarowski. (above photo) “Woj”, as he is known throughout the industry, has very close ties to the NBA. I would call him a shill, but to each is own. Well Woj–who is an employee of ESPN (hired right after the major layoffs a few years back btw)–decided to get behind a keyboard and fire off a rapid response!

Woj via his official company (ESPN) email, fired off a 2-word email to the Senator. F**K You. Yes, you read that right, both the response and the email it came from. This is the height of stupidity and from a grown man to boot.

This isn’t the first time Woj has gone out of his way to stick up for a sport whose players could probably care less about him, the other time was in the NBA preseason. Prior to a game being played in China, Daryl Morey GM of the Houston Rockets, voiced his support for protestors in Hong Kong who were protesting against their communist government. Woj and a ton of NBA players, coaches, and executives hammered Morey for his remarks, how dare he stick up for the persecuted! Long story short, Woj does his best work on his knees worshipping a fellow man’s manhood.

I am calling for his immediate termination for cause! Before you say I am overreacting, remember this same network fired Rush Limbaugh for far lesser violations some time ago. First of all, the violation Woj committed isn’t just using foul language to speak to a fellow public official, he did it on a company email platform. By doing the latter, it means that he spoke as a representative of ESPN. I hope HR is grilling him right now but somehow, I doubt anything will happen to him. Why do I say this you ask? Read more below.

So here is a screen shot of the front page of the espn.com website, notice the headline of the article “Senator: NBA limiting social justice messages.”

It basically attacks Hawley and is very one sided, and then ESPN slipped this little nugget in toward the end of the article:

In response to the senator’s letter, ESPN NBA insider Adrian Wojnarowski replied with a profane email. The senator posted Wojnarowski’s reply on his social media account.

“I was disrespectful and I made a regrettable mistake,” Wojnarowski said in an apology. “I’m sorry for the way I handled myself and I am reaching out immediately to Senator Hawley to apologize directly. I also need to apologize to my ESPN colleagues because I know my actions were unacceptable and should not reflect on any of them.”

ESPN also issued a statement, which said: “This is completely unacceptable behavior and we do not condone it. It is inexcusable for anyone working for ESPN to respond in the way Adrian did to Senator Hawley. We are addressing it directly with Adrian and specifics of those conversations will remain internal.”

There you have it folks, all will remain internal, meaning nothing will be done. Woj will keep his job and continue his worship services same time Monday morning. By the way, why is he apologizing to his colleagues? Most, if not, all likely hold the same viewpoint. Let me just make sure I have this straight; NBA, BLM, and China are all perfect, yet the people of Hong Kong, and police are the problem? How many of us would have been terminated instantly for a similar email being fired off? Truth be told I’m not sure how much longer Disney will keep ESPN around. Their parks are still closed, and there have been 0 in the way of sports happening. Oh, and zero movies released over the last several months. Sadly, folks like Woj will always have a job at places like ESPN, as they are nothing other than mindless lemmings; incapable of thinking for themselves. Seriously who fires off an email like that on a company owned email system?

Maybe what Woj needs is a lesson on hypocrisy. As William has pointed out before China, uses slave labor to mine for the rare metals used to make your electric cars, and production for your new iPhone, yet folks like Woj have an issue with folks supporting our police? Huh?

The Chief

Editor’s Note: The Chief sent this to me for posting several days ago, but due to work and binge-watching Warrior Nun on Netflix over the weekend, I didn’t get around to it promptly.

Oh, Wojnarowski was finally suspended by ESPN for two weeks. Several NBA players, that hate America as much as Colin Kaepernick, have rallied to his defense. Links to related articles appear below:

ESPN suspends NBA reporter Adrian Wojnarowski after profane email to Sen. Hawley: reports

Senator says NBA shouldn’t limit its social messages on jerseys

Josh Hawley invites ESPN CEO to talk China, NBA amid clash with sports reporter

ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski responds to Missouri senator’s email: F–k you

Dumb jocks won’t even move to the Soviet CA

By Chief

As I write from the news desk at reallyright.com this weekend, I came across an article that featured a football player. Of course, I figured he is dumb because well…like Democrats, they say athletes are dumb. “I was tuld so whil in skool.”

Back in the day, I attended Jesuit High School. I know the athlete stereotype first-hand. As a freshman and sophomore (which means “wise fool” in Latin by the way), I was viewed as a great scholar. I played no sports, I was focused on school. As a junior and senior, I played football, (NOT A BIG DEAL) and suddenly I was viewed as a dumb jock. BRAG ALERT, BRAG ALERT!!!!! We went undefeated my junior year, only team to ever do that by the way (AGAIN NOT A BIG DEAL).

Humble brag over for now, let’s share the story. A player on my favorite football team, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, also known as the team that completely embarrassed the Oakland/Los Angles/Las Vegas/wherever Raiders, made news this week. Shaq Barrett signed with Tampa in last offseason for 4 million dollars. He had a great year and most folks figured he would go to a true professional team, as Tampa is the worst team in football history. My spies tell me he will be back in Tampa after leading the league in quarterback sacks last year, but in case you were wondering, he won’t be going to Los Angeles.

“If [other teams] offer me more than Tampa, I’m going to look at the places, if they offer me more than Tampa, I’m going to look at what their taxes is compared to Tampa’s. Because I ain’t going to live in L.A. and get taxed crazy,” Shaq said.

“I’m not going to take drastically less but I am open to doing what I think is best for my career, and I think that would be staying in Tampa.”

Shaq Barrett has two reasons for willingness to take discount with Buccaneers
Shaq Barrett–proudly playing for Tampa Bay

Ouch………. Are you listening Gavin Newsom?????

But he’s a dumb jock right????? Just like me in High School as most on the left would say we “don’t cum to play skool.” They could not be more wrong about most of us. We are normal people some just with gifts from God, me being tall and fast. However, it’s funny. My first two years at Jesuit, I barely achieved, and I could care less about school. I had a 2.3 GPA; however, I was viewed as a scholar. I was loved by my teachers, then I became a “dumb jock” and it’s funny my GPA at graduation from Jesuit, regarded as a top institution of higher learning, was 3.75. Funny because when I enrolled I took elementary algebra, and other classes I could care less about, my junior year I took calculus, and took care of business. My point being we aren’t dumb jocks, we prefer you guys thinking we are.

Gavin you have it smoking in California…keep it up. Your state stinks so bad even the Raiders are leaving. It’s ironic actually, your voters are much like fans of the 49ers, Raiders, Rams, and Chargers, they haven’t been relevant in decades.

The Chief

Trump brings a Championship to DC!

By Troll

Folks he promised a lot of winning so much winning you would get tired of all this winning. Well……guess what? The Washington Nationals baseball club won the World Series, defeating the Houston Astros to bring the championship home to ole DC!!!!

Trump made good on his pledge, frankly he brought a championship in hockey in 2018, but that’s a Canadian sport so it doesn’t count. Plus I think NAFTA was ripped up so, I’m sure the liberals won’t count it anyways. Frankly they probably think the Capital are just Capital letters anyways.

President Trump with Stanley Cup winners

Yes, the Nationals, by the way a former Canadian team…the former Montreal Expos won the World Series, and the home crowd booed the Trumpster, he was there for game 5. It is very odd they would do this, especially since Houston most recently had an executive fired for making insensitive comments about a pitcher (Roberto Ozuna) who beat his wife and was subsequently suspended by MLB. The executive was fired and I figured it was a new #metoo movement? I figured everyone would be behind the Nationals, but I guess not. Even those who hate Trump I figured they would unite behind the Nationals, but to no avail.

Pour one out Charles Krauthammer you were a huge Nationals fan and I hope you are smiling in heaven (where you go upon death non-believers) your team won it! You were a believer in the Trumpster and I know your legacy is being carried on by Trump!

The Washington Nationals will visit the White House on Monday to celebrate the franchise’s first-ever World Series title.

The White House made the announcement on its official Twitter account on Friday. The team defeated the Houston Astros in seven games to win the World Series on Wednesday.

Washington Nationals to visit White House on Monday to celebrate World Series title

In many ways this World Series was much like the election…the underdog Nationals (Trump) beat the heavy favorite Astros (Crooked Hillary) badly and the entire country is stunned, even those in our nation’s capital. Oh some in DC doubted him but Trump brought it home, another championship, some said he couldn’t do it…but he did…..I’m tired of all this winning.

We’re Nuts…about the Nats….we’re nuts about the Nats
We’re crazy about the Nationals and nuts about the Nats…..
They are nuts about the Nat’s
Sing it proud
They are crazy about the Nationals and nuts about the Nats!

I will never get sick of winning….go Trump!!!!!!!!!!!
Hope Hicks, I’m on fire come on…….
Look I even wore my best Trump costume on Halloween and no one says “No” to the Troll when he puts on his dancing shoes!!!!!!

The Troll as President Trump–greatest costume ever!!!

Come on Hope…..Date the Troll, much like your old boss, I win at everything!!!!!

Hope Hicks reading another text from The Troll

The Troll

Ultimate Fantasy Football Team

Everyone seems to be playing fantasy football this year so I figured it better try my hand. Every team seems to have a theme like favorite players or something, so the troll had his own ideas. This team is likely to never ever get beat, we will explain later.

First we like to build our team like the Raiders or Cowboys, with no regard to morality. You see choir boys don’t win championships, and there is a direct correlation between arrests and winning! Repeat offenders are welcome, we have zero standards on this squad!

Here is the team:

Raider Troll

QB1 Ben Roethisberger: multiple women have accused him of rape, he was never found guilty.
QB2 Jameis Winston: accused of rape in college, DA, US Atty, and local judge declined charges. Accused of sexual harassment in the NFL, again never charged. With that kind of elusiveness he is a great fit.

Houston Oiler Troll

RB1 Kareem Hunt: Punched 2 women, 1 in college 1 last year in the pros, we was the best RB in the league until he was suspended.
RB2: Joe Mixon: Hit women in college, breaking her jaw. Imagine what kind of pain he can dole out to opposing defenses!
RB3 Adrian Peterson: Beat his kid with a switch putting him in the hospital, sounds like a guy for us!
RB4 Ezekiel Elliot: Look at his record, speaks for itself, I haven’t seen an Ezekiel do that much damage since the Old Testament!
RB5 Le’veon Bell: Got DUI, told cops I didn’t know you could get one from drugs, then in court told the judge he still uses everyday. My kind of guy, strong back, weak mind.

49er Troll

WR1: Josh Gordon: We wrote about him in this space, major drug guy, criminal to boot.
WR2: Tyreek Hill: Beat his girl 2 separate times, then had her lie to the police about it. He knows you need a fall guy this day and age.
WR3 Antonio Brown: A late trade by us, threatened to beat up his teams GM, in addition to a litany of other character “flaws” a late steal.
WR4 Desean Jackson: A major thug, but a needed veteran leader.

Redskin Troll

TE1 Aaron Hernandez: He is still alive, just chilling with Elvis and Tupac. Brings a killer instinct.

Bronco troll

Kicker: Carli Lloyd: Not a criminal but the team said she would be a delight to be around and a definite asset in the locker room.

Armed Chief Troll

This team will beat you on the field, in the parking lot and just to prove a point, beat your girl as well.

Obviously this is a troll blog, but it goes to show the amount of all-stars in the NFL who are very bad people. Let’s see how we do this year!

Carli Lloyd Wants to Play in the NFL! Huh?

By Chief

In case you missed it, last week USWNT soccer player Carli Lloyd was invited to a joint practice between the Eagles and Ravens, two NFL teams. During the practice Lloyd went out and kicked a few 55 yard field goals and made them…which is saying a lot as offseason kicking is through a much smaller goal post than used during the regular season. It went viral and started rumors she could play for an NFL team, and as recent as today, she claims a team offered her a chance to kick in a game Thursday.

Okay, let’s snap back to reality for a minute here folks and get serious.

But first let me throw this out there, it’s very cool she had her moment. At 37 years of age, she is in the twilight of her soccer career as witnessed by her being a substitute during the World Cup. Her being able to drill a kick like she did is awesome because it was a no-win situation. Hear me out, she made the kick, and she went viral, a couple Ravens players even say she should get a try-out. Flip side, she misses the kick and all the alpha male types call out “stick to the kitchen” “it’s a man’s game” etc., etc. You know the type. But she made the kick the offers apparently have come in…and Lloyd is considering trying out next year in a real game. Big mistake if she takes them up, take it from me, I played in High School.

What she was doing was akin to going to a local high school or junior college and while wearing athletic attire kicking from the 45 (the end zone adds 10 yards) against air. Folks it’s one thing to kick field goals wearing soccer cleats, gym shorts, a sports bra and that’s it. I will allow fellow writer, The Troll, to speculate on whether or what type of underwear she was wearing…however, her being married means he should just move on or keep longing for Hope Hicks. The NFL requires players to wear football cleats (ask any of us, there is a big difference) shoulder pads (try wailing your arms out like she does when she was kicking…you can’t). In addition you must wear a girdle consisting of pads on both hips, and a tail bone pad, now you can have smaller pads but they must be worn, adding another difference to her normal uniform. She would not have to wear thigh or knee pads, since the kickers typically don’t. She would have to wear a helmet impeding her vision as well. She also took about 5 steps to kick, in the NFL you get about 2…it makes a difference. Also she will be kicking while facing 11 guys trying to block the kick.

George Blanda retired from pro football in 1976 as the oldest player to ever play at the age of 48. He was one of only two players to play in four different decades. He was a quarterback and then kicker.

It’s a safety issue more than a gender issue. This was even pointed out by Keenan Allen who plays for the Chargers, what happens if the kick is blocked? Remember kicking in the preseason means you are playing against people trying to fight for a couple open slots on the roster, not a bunch of laid back starters going through the motions. I hate to say this but I would take bets one or two players intentionally try to “blow her up” to just send a message to all females. When a kick is blocked, you cannot just get out of the way…more players have been injured in the outskirts of the play or pile than in the pile. Think those guys want a girl to score on them? A message would be sent.

In short, Carli you have had a great career and in my opinion you are an excellent role model for all young women in this country. Not to mention you called out your pink haired, looney teammate who kneeled for the national anthem. Carli, you and any women who feels they can hang, are more than welcome to kick back and if the coaches allow you, sure take a few kicks during practice. But kicking in a game situation would very likely result in serious injuries and possibly debilitating ones. My thoughts about your attractiveness aside (you’re very good looking), use your platform as a world champion and keep speaking your mind about things you care about. You had a great few moments in the spotlight, but when your friends tell you most NFL kickers play into their 40s they have also been training for this their entire life, you just started. Painkillers and steroids are also rampant in the NFL and most of those guys are hawked-up to the point they cannot think straight. Your NFL dreams may get crushed before they start. Think about it.


There Really Is a Homeless Olympics

Back when he was first starting out, Rush Limbaugh used to joke that the perfect place to hold the Homeless Olympics would be in Rio Linda, California. Rio Linda was often described as a place with cars on blocks in the front yard, random televisions and shopping carts strewn about, along with other assorted debris. In short, the place was a mess. Rush wanted the people there to clear the place up and take some pride and ownership of their neighborhood. Rush offered to leave them alone if they renamed the place Rio Limbaugh which they never did.

Concerning the Homeless Olympics, Rush envisioned various events while taking well-earned shots at homeless advocate Mitch Snyder.

Mitch Snyder 1943 – 1990

Proposed events would be things like dumpster diving, races carrying a televisions (simulating their theft), relays pushing shopping carts, etc. Here’s an example from 1989.

“One of the things I want to do before I die is conduct the homeless Olympics,” he told his audience. Events would include “the 10-meter Shopping Cart Relay, the Dumpster Dig and the Hop, Skip and Trip,” he said as the audience erupted into laughter and applause.

Rush Limbaugh Gives Liberals the Business, Gets Plenty Himself : Radio: The conservative talk-show host, whose program is nationally syndicated, is a major commercial enterprise.

This quote above was from Limbaugh’s Rush to Excellence Tour.

At the time, one person wrote the Los Angeles Times concerning the above article and said:

Making fun of homeless people is a “traditional value”? Well, excuse me, but where I come from, that is nothing more than nastiness and meanness–behavior befitting a bully.

Limbaugh Olympics

If you thought this was nonsense, insensitive, and mocking the homeless, then guess what? You were wrong.

There really is a Homeless Olympics. However, it’s not called that lest Rush get some of the credit for the idea, the official name is the Homeless World Cup. It began in 2003 and represents 70 nations.

To be a player you must meet the following qualifications:

  • Be at least 16 years old at the time of the tournament
  • Have not taken part in previous Homeless World Cup tournaments

Also, must be any of the following:

  • Have been homeless at some point after the previous year’s tournament in accordance with the national definition of homelessness
  • Make their main living income as a streetpaper vendor
  • Be asylum seekers currently without positive asylum status or who were previously asylum seekers but obtained residency status a year before the event
  • Currently be in drug or alcohol rehabilitation and also have been homeless at some point in the past two years

Source: Homeless World Cup

California has one third of the homeless population in the United States due to its great weather and even better benefits. It’s no surprise to me that from the shadows of Rio Linda comes three athletes making the trip to England to compete in this year’s events.

Rio Linda is on north side of Sacramento metro area

Three Sacramento women will soon be representing Team USA in this year’s Homeless World Cup.

Now, she and two other women will be representing the U.S. in the sporting spectacle known as the Homeless World Cup where 500 players will be representing 50 proud nations.

Three Sacramento Women Representing Team USA At The Homeless World Cup

So thirty years after the prediction, Rio Linda folks are participating in a worldwide homeless competition to see who brings home (if they had one) the gold medal.

Rob Manfred MLB Commissioner: Confirmed Day Drinker

by Troll

Rob Manfred is Commissioner of Major League Baseball; a declining sport with plenty of pressing issues. This week he decided to play politician regarding the Tampa Bay Rays.

Tampa Bay was founded as an expansion team in 1995, and after years of being as hapless as possible, they finally got good. Problem is they have needed a new stadium for years. They play in an antiquated circus dome, featuring 4 catwalks, (would love to see Ms. Hicks strut her stuff on one) hitting a ball off two of these is a home run, the other two means the ball is in play and it causes great confusion. They also play on AstroTurf that has been described as a thin piece of cloth with concrete under it, causing the ball to take awkward kangaroo hops in random directions.

However, to the point of this article, Manfred has been trying to get the Rays a new stadium for years. Attendance has been horrible since they came into the league…probably because people wonder how you can play this sport in a body of water (Tampa Bay). Tampa and their owner have been very stingy about wanting to pay for a new stadium so as a result the owner has teased about relocating to other cities…Portland, Nashville, Mexico City etc. Baseball wants to expand but cannot do this until Oakland and Tampa Bay get new ballparks.

Muppet #1

While pondering league expansion, Manfred apparently picked up a large bottle of booze (or magic mushrooms from Oakland) and after a 72 hour bender, he thought this would be a good idea. He attempted to imitate the great feat of wisdom shown by the biblical King Solomon when he declared that two mothers split the same baby. Lord Manfred said the Rays could explore playing in two different towns during the same season, actually he green lighted it if the Rays so agree. His idea…play one half of the season in Tampa, and the other half in Montreal…which by the way lost their team a while back due to attendance issues. Since Montreal is seen as a frontrunner to get a new team, he wants to see how attendance goes.

Muppet #2

This is literally one of the stupidest things I have ever heard. He wants the players, many of whom do not live in the town they play in on anything more than a seasonal basis, to have to buy another place in Montreal? Does he realize how far Montreal is from Tampa, Florida? (1,491 miles) How could a team possibly try to recruit players to join it when you will now have Canadian taxes charged to your paycheck as well? The travel schedule will be brutal! This has to be one of the worst ideas; seriously I’m still waiting for him to walk it back and say he was blitzed when he came up with it.

Muppet #3

My Idea:

Baseball plays 162 games a year, half of which being home games, so 81….who gets the 41st game Montreal or Tampa? I say screw it, let’s do a mashup, first 4.5 innings in Tampa, then both teams get on planes, go through customs and play the second half of said game in Montreal, on the same day mind you! That would be bananas! Like a 7 hour layover between pitches….what a time to be alive! As far as the name of this team? I would go with the Tampa Bay Ex-Rays of Montreal. Thus paying homage to the former name of the Expos, yet combining with the Rays name. The Ex-Rays is also a homage to all the retired people in Florida. The team’s jersey should be a mashup too, half Expos-half Rays, and under the English words, put a translation in French Canadian! Pay the players in American dollars for the first half of said game, then upon conclusion, a check in Canadian Loons!

Market this game as the Equinox, playing half the day in USA and the second half in Canada! Both cities are known for being the strip club capitals of their respective countries…I would play this up big time! Lose the foul pole, replace with a stripper pole, instant entertainment and a great reason to go to the game! You could easily have promotions of father/daughter amateur day at the park, where you get a free ticket if she struts her stuff! The team could even call it career day…I mean really work that angle here man…gotta prepare people for a future career! Why wait to payoff that student loan debt? Personally, I reject the notion that robots are better companions than people.

Rather than call the private boxes at the ballpark “suites,” I would call them “penthouses,” get your entertainment in multiple ways at said game. Heck this idea could revolutionize the seventh inning stretch, just look at what Colin Kaepernick did for the national anthem; except this would be a move in a more positive and friendly direction. It would promote friendship by bring people together and who’s opposed to that?

I would call the bars “The Library” where scantily clad women serve drinks and perform…think about this….don’t dismiss the idea…tell your wife/girl/spouse you’re going to the library! Think about it again…girls could tell their parents they have a job working at the library…boom instant alibi. How about Tinder or Ashley Madison night…you can rent a one bed penthouse by the hour, or minute? If you make it on the Jumbotron screen during the stretch maybe you could get a free round for the penthouse. The more the merrier.

We aren’t male chauvinists here at Really Right. We are ok with equal opportunity, so we will have Grindr night as well…hell one of baseball’s expressions is “pulling the ball!” Not to be outdone, we are developing an app for ladies, Munchr, again a famous expression in baseball…”go the other way”….equal opportunity here man! Attendance would skyrocket and this thing will work. I’m quitting my job as an unpaid blogger and going to pitch this thing to MLB. Sex sells man, play this thing up! I mean think of what my girl Hope Hicks could do there.

Blogger’s epilogue: This is literally the stupidest idea I’ve heard in a while. Look at Manfred, this guy is a Muppet. Why don’t you deal with steroids, apathy, and horrible attendance you dumb Muppet. By the way, anyone got Hope Hicks cell #

Hope Hicks–Wanna stroll with the Troll?

Day drinking has severe consequences Manfred, take a lap!


Aaron Hernandez Disciple Arrested for Murder

Photo above Heyzel Obando with husband Tony Joiner
Folks The Chief has no reservations about calling you out when you harm your squaw. Sadly today is such a day.

Happy Sunday, I guess. I was greeted with a reader email saying the University of Florida was back in the news, as former Safety (didn’t keep her safe) Tony Joiner was arrested for the murder of his wife today.

Earl Tony Joiner

Joiner played at Florida from 2004-2007. He was captain of the team that featured Aaron Hernandez. Joiner, I guess you could call him alumni, is charged with the death of his wife; who died…guess this, in 2016! In addition, it wasn’t until 2 months after her death the police ruled it a homicide…I guess some things take longer in Florida since they cancelled CSI Miami. Then again, this state tried to cry voter fraud regarding “hanging chads” and other shenanigans. He murdered her on Valentine’s Day; a day most couples are looking to celebrate as one, not looking to be killed by someone.

Joiner, who won a national championship at Florida and was a distinguished member, made a fatal mistake! When you’re a disciple of now deceased (thank god) piece of human excrement Aaron Hernandez, you need to clean the scene of the crime! Have a fall guy! Did you learn nothing at Florida?

Aaron Hernandez — murderer

Joiner was a standout safety for the Gators from 2004-07 under former head coach Urban Meyer. He served as a team captain during his senior season.

Joiner is the second player from the 2007 Gators team to be charged with murder, following Aaron Hernandez’s conviction.

Former Florida Gators football star Tony Joiner charged with murdering wife

I understand you likely never found the inside of a classroom there but still, be a good disciple! Maybe you missed a chapter in the book, but now you’re caught. When reached for comment, Joiner said “dindu nuffin” so I guess let’s release him. I hear nothing from Black Lives Matter on this…so I guess his wife (who is black by the way) didn’t matter either? You are literal scum Joiner; your mug shot proves it. Don’t drop the soap, you worthless scum! Real men don’t kill women.

However, congrats on finding a new daddy in jail, trust me it’ll happen. I hope you like jailhouse oatmeal, and if you’re, lucky you can get some food from the commissary. Depending on the jail you may even have an ocean view. No word yet on whether you are kicked out of Aaron Hernandez church, but I guarantee Urban “Oscar” Meyer your former coach is disappointed you didn’t learn what he taught you.

Urban Meyer, Ohio State Head Coach

Urban Meyer can roast in Hell too….

The Chief