Category: Christianity

By Troll

The Blog Father sent an urgent communication to Jake the Snake which he received while at work yesterday. It was an article that said the Pope during his sermon (or homily) earlier this week said folks should refrain from trolling during Lent.*

On Wednesday, Pope Francis added a modern twist to the list of things to quit during the season and beyond: insulting people on social media.

The pope made his appeal to tone things down while speaking to tens of thousands of people in St. Peter’s Square for his general audience on Ash Wednesday, the start of the 40-day season that leads up to Easter.

Pope to Catholics: For Lent, give up trolling

Just like in the presidential debates, when you call someone out or invoke their name, they get a chance to respond….so Jake put out the Bat Signal and………………..Troll Attack!!!!!!!

At first, Troll thought for certain the signal was a notification of a direct message from Hope Hicks, but alas it was not to be. Once he heard the Pope was gunning for him; however, Troll reacted mercilessly with the following rant.

Batten down the hatches readers Troll takes zero prisoners, better hope he doesn’t get after you next!

First of all……lighten up Francis! Because no one has been a bigger troll than you since you became Pope. Maybe rather than talking down and looking over your fiefdom, you should talk to the actual people; like you once did when you started as a priest and again as a bishop? Back in the day when you didn’t ride around in a Popemobile and didn’t wear such a ridiculous hat?

Give it to me again……give it to me again…..I’m just heating up!!!!!!!

Remember that time when you slapped that poor ladies hand when she tried to touch you…..haven’t you heard of the #metoo movement! Sorry I need to give up trolling on Twitter so…Me Too Movement! You may have apologized, but who do you confess your sins to!!!!!! Jesus himself????? I would love to think your confession penance was to kiss and make up….but that’s only allowed with priests and young boys!!!!!!!

Give it to me again…..Give it to me again…..Give it to me again!

Speaking of the young boys scandal, why do you continue to hide bishops, priests and others who actually did abuse their victims? You know like maybe de-frock them and allow prosecutors to do their job, you may be wealthy and powerful (the Pope usually is one of the most wealthy) but you’re not above the law.

Ok I caught my second wind……Give it to me again…give it to me again!!!!!!!

Why Francis, do you continue to apologize for the church’s misdeeds? Every Easter and Christmas service I hear the same speech which I am told comes directly from you. Look, these folks I call Creasters–they attend at Christmas and Easter only–which I don’t see as being a big deal, yet we constantly pander to them…how come? They do attend on what most would say are the two most important days of Holy Obligation.

One last time Troll…..Troll him!!!!!

Francis, why have you in essence become a Democrat? I say that because you take to the pulpit and you constantly lecture us on what Marx said we should do, not what the Bible says. Shouldn’t your job be to grow the church? Why did I see a sermon from you on how the death penalty is immoral, even though the Bible says “an eye for an eye?” If God didn’t believe in the death penalty then why did Jesus have to die? You tell us in America we must take refugees and immigrants, yet the Vatican where you reside is a closed environment surrounded with a large wall and security force? Must be nice to “do onto others as you would do onto yourself.” I say you are a Democrat not because of your social justice upbringing but because you have made the church into an apologist for all we have done bad over the years, yes, the Bible shares some very nice things from our past, yet why must we continue to apologize for it? I don’t hear Japan apologizing for Pearl Harbor each year!

Oh Boy one last time…..give it to me again….give it to me again!!!!!

Francis, do us a solid, quit worrying about Twitter trolls, because they will not stop; instead, spread the good news of the Bible. The church used to be something where differences were tolerated, now we get shamed or demeaned constantly, all under your tutelage. I used to attend a church where our priest once gave a pro-Prop 8 sermon, I visited that church last year, and it’s so far left of center now, I thought they would be sponsoring an abortion clinic and conducting gay marriages. My current place of worship is now dominated by folks with Bernie or Hillary bumper stickers; keep in mind those same people while being social justice warriors like you, elect apostate Catholics to office at the State and federal level who want to spend my taxpayer dollars to fund abortions thru all nine months of pregnancy!

Ok I lied….I’ll hit confession Friday….give it to me again……give it to me again!!!!!

Finally how come you don’t stick up for Christians? We are being persecuted as a group throughout the Middle East, and now in Europe, for nothing other than our Catholic faith. Additionally ISIS has said they want you and all Christians dead. Yet you don’t speak out against any of this. Funny that you find time to tell me about how bad my beliefs on the death penalty are? Or chide me that I’m not all in on the myth of global warming? I thought you were supposed to say God is in charge not man. You won’t stick up for Christians in China either but give your blessing to the government that persecutes your flock. You should be focused on growing the church, yet you choose these dumb social justice fights? And worse yet you choose to talk about the evils of trolling? Like you ever actually use Twitter? Maybe you should be more like President Trump and clean house….remove the filth, turn over the bad apples to local prosecutors…most seem more than willing to knee cap the church anyway…..let them do it! As far as folks whose beliefs stray from the church’s teachings on; abortion, pre-marital sex, the death penalty etc? They will answer to God upon death, and that’s ok. But please, please stop this senseless trolling you have done since you were elected Pope, or step down….because if I looked up rudderless ship in the dictionary, it would be a photo of the Vatican.

The Troll

Let me leave you with some additional photos of future Mrs. Troll as I will give her up for Lent!

• Bloggers note: Lent is a season in Christianity leading up to Easter, where for the layman us Catholics “give up” something for Lent…basically an almsgiving. I personally Hope the Troll gives up Hope, because we can all agree there is none for him.

Yesterday, I did something that I’ve never done before, I went to a lunch where Ham was the featured item. Folks this is very rare for me. You see, as a rule, I really avoid any kind of ham. About every four years you’ll catch me with a sliver of the Honey Baked Ham but otherwise it’s a nonstarter.

Yesterday however was different. I loaded the family into the car and drove all the way to Modesto for a special lunch. You see Ham was featured but not on the menu. No, the menu was actually BBQ meat–pork or beef–and chicken, rice, BBQ veggies, salad, and so forth. It was served buffet style at Big Valley Grace Community Church.

The event was a fundraising presentation by Answers in Genesis (AIG). This is the second such event that we’ve been invited to attend, the other being last spring in Stockton.

Answers in Genesis is a group that is built on the premise that the Bible is true. While this sounds like something most Christians claim in their denomination’s statement of faith, in reality, most folks put a mental asterisk next to such a claim. They have dumbed-down the Scriptures and the faith so that they don’t conflict with whatever thing is popular today. If the Bible is in conflict, it gets jettisoned in favor of popular culture. Believing there is a separation between secular and sacred is such a false dilemma. Trying to reconcile evolution and Genesis is another.

AIG rightly understands that if you deny six-day creation, Adam’s Fall, and Noah’s Flood, and reduce them to allegory and myth, then eventually you will deny all supernatural claims of Scripture including the virgin birth and bodily resurrection of Christ.

What I find amazing is that folks that don’t believe in any of the supernatural claims of the Bible continue to call themselves Christian. Sadly, some of them occupy the pulpits of formerly orthodox denominations that are now on the forefront of schism and heresy.

The speaker at yesterday’s event was AIG founder Ken Ham. Ham talked about his organization, the tourist destination that his group has built, and the witness that they are making for Christ and biblical inerrancy.

He also spoke briefly of how he got involved in the issue of defending Genesis. He credits his parents for teaching him apologetics, even though they never used that word.

I was happy that he credited Whitcomb and Morris’s book The Genesis Flood as being influential on him. This book had a profound impact on me when I read it in junior high school. I have tried with varying degrees of success to get others to read it too. If you only read two other books in your life besides the Bible, they should be the Genesis Flood and Kingdom of the Cults by Walter Martin.

Ham made a point of repeatedly saying that it is the church that has failed the culture and needs reformation. Until we stand on the Word, we will have no impact on the world around us. He views his mission as equipping believers with the tools to withstand the many attacks on the faith that are brought to bear by those around us.

The meeting closed and we were asked to see the guys at the back table if we were interested in contributing. We had a family photo taken with Ham and thanked him for his work.

I then went to the back table and turned in the paperwork, giving my usual amount and had them spread it out over many payments. In exchange I got the appropriate swag bag and their thanks.

I’m glad that Ken Ham and others are being a witness to those around us that He is There and He is not Silent—as Francis Schaeffer used to say.

This blog is the result of a recent discussion about Mary, the mother of Jesus.

For the past two years, my family has been worshipping as part of a conservative Lutheran congregation. Last weekend, I was invited to a church related event held in someone’s home. Part of the discussion was about the life of Jesus.

Except for one incident about Jesus visiting Jerusalem at age twelve, all we know of his life is centered on either his birth or subsequent ministry at the age of 30. Nevertheless, within the gospels are interspersed a few nuggets concerning his background and that of his earthly family.

At the event last weekend, I think I conducted myself well—theologically speaking—during most of the discussion except in one area where stepped in it. Below is a more reasoned and thorough discussion of some of the controversial topics discussed that evening.

Note to readers: I’m going to deal with today’s subjects in terms of the Roman Catholic and Protestant branches of Christianity, while I think the Orthodox folks would mostly agree with Rome, I’m not familiar enough with their theology to say for certain. As is typical on my blog, all verses are from KJV.

Mary and Joseph

I think I’m on fairly safe ground when I say that Mary was young when she became the mother of Jesus. I’m not aware of any dispute in the historic church on this point. However, Joseph is another matter altogether. Joseph is sometimes portrayed as being near the same age as Mary but many Protestants and virtually all of Rome would disagree. The prima facie proof that Joseph was much older than Mary is that Joseph is never mentioned by name after Jesus’ visit to the temple at age twelve.

And when he was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem after the custom of the feast. And when they had fulfilled the days, as they returned, the child Jesus tarried behind in Jerusalem; and Joseph and his mother knew not of it.
Luke 2: 42-43

Ok, but what about Jesus’ family? He was not an only child.

Brothers and Sisters

Jesus’ siblings were mentioned in a few different places.

And when he was come into his own country, he taught them in their synagogue, insomuch that they were astonished, and said, Whence hath this man this wisdom, and these mighty works? Is not this the carpenter’s son? is not his mother called Mary? and his brethren, James, and Joses, and Simon, and Judas? And his sisters, are they not all with us? Whence then hath this man all these things? And they were offended in him. But Jesus said unto them, A prophet is not without honour, save in his own country, and in his own house.
Matthew 13:54-57

Same account from Mark’s gospel.

And he went out from thence, and came into his own country; and his disciples follow him. And when the sabbath day was come, he began to teach in the synagogue: and many hearing him were astonished, saying, From whence hath this man these things? and what wisdom is this which is given unto him, that even such mighty works are wrought by his hands? Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joses, and of Juda, and Simon? and are not his sisters here with us? And they were offended at him. But Jesus said unto them, A prophet is not without honour, but in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.
Mark 6:1-4

The wedding at Cana–Jesus’ first miracle.

After this he went down to Capernaum, he, and his mother, and his brethren, and his disciples: and they continued there not many days.
John 2:12

Below is a summary of other mentions in the New Testament of Jesus’ mother and siblings.

Jesus’ brothers, sisters & mother

Jesus’ siblings are mentioned as accompanying Jesus and his mother to Capernaum after the marriage at Cana (John 2:12). Later Mary and these brothers are recorded as seeking an audience with Jesus (Matthew 12:46-50; Mark 3:31-35; Luke 8:19-21). Toward the end of Jesus’ ministry, His brethren are mentioned as urging Jesus to prove His Messiahship, which they themselves doubted (John 7:3-5). That they were later converted is clear, for they are described in Acts as uniting with the disciples and others in “prayer and supplication” prior to Pentecost (Acts 1:13-14). Paul implies that they were all married (1 Corinthians 9:5).

Many commentators hold that the author of the epistle of Jude, who identifies himself as the “brother of James,” was one of these brothers (Jude 1). It is also generally believed that the leader of the church at Jerusalem was James the brother of Jesus, (see Acts 12:17; 15:13). This seems to be confirmed by Paul’s reference to his visit to Jerusalem, in which he states that he saw only Peter, and “James, the Lord’s brother” (Galatians 1:18-19).

Did Jesus have any brothers, sisters or siblings?

Rome and some Protestants believe that the brothers and sisters mentioned above were not Mary’s biological offspring but Joseph’s from a previous marriage, making them all half siblings. They assert that Joseph was a widower that then wed a much younger woman. Some of you may wonder why it matters and others will jump to where I’m going next.

Mary: a Perpetual Virgin?

You see, some maintain that Mary was and remained a virgin throughout her entire life. Thus they need for the four brothers and unknown number of sisters of Jesus to be someone else’s children.

I first encountered this issue about fifth grade. I went to a Catholic elementary school and my Religion class was taught by nun. I was a Catholic at the time but had run across some folks that got me to read the Bible for myself. I brought this passage to my teacher and she was horrified.

“Is not this the carpenter’s son? is not his mother called Mary? and his brethren, James, and Joses, and Simon, and Judas? And his sisters, are they not all with us?”

In fact her response to this and other questions I brought to her that year was that we needed to leave biblical interpretation up to priests and bishops. She stated that lay folks were not capable of understanding the Bible on their own. She stated furthermore that if we began reading the Bible for ourselves, we might become heretics like Martin Luther.

FYI that was the first time I had ever heard the name, Martin Luther.

Folks remember that she was my teacher for a class to instruct me in Christianity—Roman style—and that was her view!

My Dissent

Folks I dissent on the claim that Mary was perpetually a virgin. There is simply no biblical warrant for such an idea. There are biblical passages on the issue but why let them get in the way of something that you need to be in there because of your presuppositions on celibacy?

Let’s skip my opinion and jump right into the Bible.

Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife: And knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called his name JESUS.
Matthew 1:24 & 25

Oh, the King James Bible usage of the word “knew” in this passage means the same as it does in Genesis 4:1. (For purists, I’m arguing the KJV is consistent in the way they translate this idea of marital relations. I’m fully aware that NT was Greek while Genesis was originally Hebrew.)

And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.

Knew in Strong’s is #1097 in Greek. If you look it up you will find “3. By a Hebraistic euphemism…is used of the carnal connection of male and female”

And the final nail in the perpetual virginity coffin is a quote from Mary herself.

Then said Mary unto the angel, How shall this be, seeing I know not a man?
Luke 1:34

Strong’s citation of #1097 indicates that the same word is used in both passages, Matthew 1:25 and Luke 1:34. Thus Mary didn’t have sexual relations with Joseph until after Jesus was born which is just what Matthew says. Any speculation about Jesus’ siblings being from a previous relationship of Joseph or Mary being a perpetual virgin do violence to the clear reading of the gospels.

So far, I think I’ve been on strong (pardon the pun) theological ground; however, I then got myself off of firm ground and out on a limb.

Did Jews call Jesus a bastard?

The short answer is yes, but my question was when? And why?

The Talmud seems to reference Jesus and when it does, in an unfavorable light, but whether these references are original or later edits is debatable. If you wish to wade into this question, see Jesus in the Talmud However, at some point, Jesus was accused of being the offspring of Mary and a roman soldier.

Does the New Testament indicate that Jesus’ critics made such accusations? At the event last week, I asserted that they did and of course was challenged. At the time, I couldn’t find a biblical reference. Later I did find the passage where the Jews called Jesus a bastard.

They answered and said unto him, Abraham is our father. Jesus saith unto them, If ye were Abraham’s children, ye would do the works of Abraham. But now ye seek to kill me, a man that hath told you the truth, which I have heard of God: this did not Abraham.
Ye do the deeds of your father.
Then said they to him, We be not born of fornication; we have one Father, even God.
John 8:39-41

The phrase “We be not born of fornication” is the textbook definition of “bastard”– a person born of parents not married to each other. Was this a shot at the parentage of Jesus or his theology? Both?

At least one Gospel writer indicates the possibility…

And Jesus himself began to be about thirty years of age, being (as was supposed) the son of Joseph…
Luke 3:23

Is there more evidence?

However, besides this one account of Jesus being called a bastard, the New Testament is silent on the issue… unless you can fit it in ambiguous verses like the one below.

And when they had blindfolded him, they struck him on the face, and asked him, saying, Prophesy, who is it that smote thee? And many other things blasphemously spake they against him.
Luke 22: 64 & 65

While it’s probable that the Roman soldiers called Jesus such names and worse, there is no explicit account of that in the Bible. If the soldiers did say derogatory things about Jesus’ parentage, it was just harassment of the condemned, as they would not know of the story of his virgin birth.

Also, in the verses quoted above about Jesus being “the carpenter’s son” and “Mary, his mother”, nothing indicates that the people that Jesus encountered during his ministry questioned his origins. If they had, it would have been a continuing source of harassment his entire life.

The testimony of the genealogies given in the gospel is that Jesus has a rightful claim to the throne of David both thru the linage of Joseph and Mary. Were he a bastard, this claim would be void and grounds to reject his claim as King of the Jews.

So why was I so wrong?

At last week’s gathering, I was wrong in my assertion that Jesus (and Mary) had to contend with rumors that Mary had become pregnant by someone other than Joseph. On this point I was wrong but I’m not alone.

After reflecting on the topic, I remembered where I’ve heard this claim of Jesus being called a bastard. I took this as true because I’ve heard it stated many times in the context of discussing the life issue. We, prolifers, want to try to relate our faith with women that find themselves in a crisis pregnancy. We try to make a connection between Mary being poor, single, and pregnant as a bridge to the situation these women are in so we can convince them to “save their baby.”

Our argument goes much like this: We say Mary was poor and disadvantaged. She faced disruption of her life and risked the social stigma attached to being pregnant. Her situation was much like yours now. Were Mary in your situation and chose abortion then Jesus would never be born. Thus, we argue, be like Mary, choose life for your baby.

I think this idea is based in part on distorting verses like “For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.” (Hebrews 4:15) and “Himself took our infirmities, and bare our sicknesses” (Matthew 8:17).

In our zeal to be relevant and persuasive on the life issue, we find ourselves making theological pretzels by trying to force the Bible to say something that it does not. We desperately want to make the point that Jesus loves and understands both the pregnant woman and her unborn child because he and his family went thru the same life events that the young woman is now facing.

While the sentiment is understandable, it is not biblical. We have forced the text to fit an emotional argument that we want to make, to fit an emotional situation, that yields a rational result.

Sounds good but…

Here is a typical example of a different but related argument that I have often heard. I got this example from my handy internet search engine. The author is referring to Deuteronomy 22:20-29.

As you can see, the status of betrothal was almost identical to the status of a married woman. A betrothed woman who lay with a man that was not her intended husband, was punished as if she had committed adultery.

Mary of Nazareth, unwed and pregnant, knew the punishment she faced—stoning. She had nothing but the story of an angel to tell her parents and Joseph, the man she had promised to marry. Joseph would have been well within his rights—even within his duty—to expose her sin and witness her execution.

It was only with the intervention of an angel and Joseph’s own faith-filled acceptance of the angel’s message, that saved both Mary’s life and the life of her unborn baby, the Incarnation of God.

Mary knew exactly what she would face in her home and community after she said her faith-filled “Let it be done to me according to your word” to the visiting angel. And still, she said yes. She trusted that God would take care of her, and he did, through her holy husband Joseph.

Unwed and Pregnant in Ancient Israel?

This is a classic proof that equates Mary’s situation with a crisis pregnancy in modern day America.

Was Jesus’ birth really an unplanned pregnancy?

In a rebuttal to this idea is the following:

There is a popular meme making the rounds on social media that attempts to make a clever point about the importance of being open to life. Showing an image of the Nativity, the meme states, “One unplanned pregnancy saved us all.” The problem is that not only is the meme untrue, but it reduces a sublime and divine event to a common and mundane situation.

The fact of the matter is that the Incarnation was the most “planned” pregnancy in all of human history, and NOT just from God’s perspective. After writing a post on Facebook about this meme, explaining that the plan for the Incarnation was established at the very beginning, a lot of discussion ensued, most particularly focused on whether Mary had planned on having a baby or not.

The Blessed Virgin Mary did NOT have an ‘unplanned’ pregnancy

But the question continues to be raised as to whether or not Mary’s surprise at Gabriel’s greeting and subsequent explanation of the Incarnation constitutes an “unplanned” pregnancy.

Truth cannot be based on a lie, distortion, or misstatement. We are on the right side on the life issue but misrepresenting our God, His Word, or our faith to score points at the local clinic is not the path we should choose. We can communicate God’s love to both the woman and her baby without the sentimentality of recasting the faith into something that it is not. We are challenged to “taste and see that the Lord is good” (Psalm 34:8) and that doesn’t require any artificial sweeteners to be added.

Conclusion

It is wrong to claim that Mary was perpetually a virgin and/or equate the virgin birth of Jesus with a “crisis pregnancy.” Many well-meaning folks make both claims. Lastly, no internal evidence in the New Testament exists that a shadow hung over Jesus or Mary as a result of the virgin birth. In my mind if such were the case, Jesus would be confronted with it during his public ministry or during the various trials held prior to his crucifixion.

By: Jake the Snake

Lee Ann Harper serves as the manager of the “Office of Youth Protection” for the Knights of Columbus in New Haven, Connecticut. Sounds like a really important job and I guess in some respects it is. This office was created in response to the Catholic PRIEST sex abuse scandals, because… well, let’s ignore the priests and focus on regular married/single churchgoing volunteers. Yes, you read that right. If you sign up to join the Knights of Columbus—a non-profit men’s group whose purpose is to serve the church—you, not clergymen, must undergo a background check and get fingerprinted prior to being able to volunteer on church property. I found this idea somewhat objectionable because who ever heard of a crisis in Catholic Church volunteers and because KOC members hardly ever work with youth. Despite my misgivings about the need for such a review of my past—I had nothing to hide and was an officer in our local council—I complied with the request. This was four years ago.

I later found out that the results of said background check were sent to the local parish office, not the mothership in New Haven, Connecticut. I have major objections to this, as a close friend of mine was recently told by the parish office that he needed to be checked again because they lost his results. These folks in the parish office, are not Knights, we do not serve them, keep in mind the parish office or diocese (governing body of the Roman Catholic Church) have no jurisdiction over us.

This past year I moved into the important “Deputy Grand Knight Role.” In essence, a position comparable to the Vice President (the Grand Knight is the top dog). In this position, I also had to take the title of Family Director. Family Director is a largely symbolic position as we have an older parish. As a result, the Family Director does nothing as far as the church is concerned.

As a young single man with no family, I know my bounds. I NEVER volunteer at youth events nor volunteer my services to drive/chaperone. The parish office knows this… I do this because the optics look bad, and as a brother Knight, I took an oath to never bring scandal on the church, or our Supreme Pontiff (the Pope). I know my lane and I stay in it…it’s a symbolic position.

Given that the Family Director is just a symbolic position on the Knight’s generic org chart, I was surprised to find an email in my spam folder directing me to submit to a background check for this position, and of course I agreed.

This email was where issues began to turn ugly with the Knights. I found this out about 6 weeks later when I got an overnight FedEx letter stuck in my door. I opened said letter and it stated that due to my driving record, keep in mind my criminal record is clean, I was unfit to hold the position of Family Director and to contact this Lee Ann Harper to discuss my volunteering further.

Let me reiterate, the Knights of Columbus is a volunteer group, one which had no issue with my previous background checks. Again, this letter never specified which position I could not hold, and I hold a bunch of positions, as you will read later.

In response to the letter, I called the mothership and low and behold, Lee Ann was not working, so I spoke to her assistant. Said assistant was the definition of a re-moron (they can’t be classified as a retard or moron, so they get their own title) and I was told that my driving record makes me ineligible.

I hung up and sent Lee Ann an email, since she was out of town according to her hired help. She responded within 15 minutes, saying I could beg for my job back and she was so sorry this happened. This is the typical response of an incompetent Jackhole. First of all, her response was from New Haven, Connecticut according to my iPhone and second, I would never beg to keep my job in a volunteer group let alone a real job. Just to remind people, the background check was only required due to a ceremonial title, not a big deal.

Harper took matters as any other incompetent Jackhole would and decided to fire-off, yet another overnight FedEx envelop claiming I was unfit for the position and was removed as Family Director. You dunked on me pretty good sending this letter to our Grand Knight and Financial Secretary both of whom are great friends. I was embarrassed. Questions were asked, and again, I have no criminal record, not expunged or dismissed. I fielded calls from both men, and both were just as confused as I am. Your exact words in your ill-fated letter to my Grand Knight was that he was directly responsible to make sure I did not hold the position I took as Family Director. I could care less about symbolic positions that are in name only, what was interesting is the remark she made later in this letter “feel free to remain as a brother Knight and keep paying your dues.” Keep paying my dues, and remain as a Knight? Weird, kinda goes back to my other blogs here. The letter sent out by Lee Ann, essentially makes me out to be a person with pedophilia in my background, even though the “sins I committed” in their eyes lie in my driving record. Again, just to reiterate, I have no criminal record, and intentionally stay away from any youth events as the optic of an unmarried young man serving as a chaperone would look bad.

The letters I received saddened me in several ways. First being I never wanted to join this group. I have always believed there is an ugly under belly in every church group and I wanted no part of “seeing how the sausage is made.” I worked a shift as a volunteer with my father who is a Knight, at the fireworks booth, and I met a good Catholic gentleman who I consider one of my closest mentors and friends. When I call, he answers and is always supportive. I still didn’t want to join; however, my father got a bad cancer diagnosis and told me it would mean a lot if I joined…so I did. My father is okay now, and my mother had two bouts with cancer and as a result I strongly believe in the power of prayer. I joined and was viewed at first as an ugly duckling; a young person who wants to volunteer when its mostly an older person’s group. It was a struggle breaking in at first, but eventually I was welcomed. I took time off work to help set up for our events, and while I was always viewed as wet behind the ears, I did my darndest to help out. The turning point was at a crab feed five years ago. I signed up to help in the kitchen and they had too much help. As a result, I was sent home but on my way out the door, I was told to “give this tray of pasta to the youth group.” They were the servers, and this was their dinner prior to the event. I did as I was instructed and was ready to head to the parking lot when a wife of a Knight told me they needed another bartender for the event…I said I would stick around and help. I was a little disappointed about not being needed in the kitchen, but I cannot blame them, and a motto I live by is “a setback is a set up for a comeback” so I helped-out. I wasn’t great. I was pouring for tips and was reminded, we aren’t at a Friday’s or Chili’s, it’s a fundraiser. The head bartender took me under his wing and my volunteerism skyrocketed. While most of my staff is deceased, I have been the bar manager for 3 years. It’s a tough job, but I am good at it now. I would even say really good, as I have been asked to bartend weddings and other events by other brother Knights.

3 years ago, our Grand Knight personally asked me to be his number 4 in command, a great honor. I chaired the Recruiting Committee last year as the number 3 and while the job is not easy, I did my job and again I was good at it. Now as the second in command I have the respect of almost everyone. I hold positions as head bar manager, Deputy Grand Knight, Chancellor of the Admission (new member ceremony) team, and the Warden (formation degree team). Most would say, if you need a guy to run an event ask Jake. In addition, I even raised over two grand for Special Olympics last year at an event I bar tended.

Yet despite my track record of service, incompetent Jackhole Lee Ann Harper wants to end all of this in a dispute over a position in name only, that does literally nothing. It’s funny that Lee Ann wants me gone so badly. In my real-world job, I’m required to undergo a background check annually and they have no issues with my record…oh, and they require that my driving record needs to be clear. In addition, I coach high school football, and both schools for which I volunteer ran my driving and criminal record yet have no issue with me coaching or even driving the players. The owner of this blog has no issue with my driving or background…yet you do?

Despite all this Lee Ann, you want me gone yet you ignore the other Knights who have never completed this type of background check upon joining. What about the leader of our youth group who has a lengthy criminal history… and is also a Knight? I even sent you his criminal record, yet he is permitted to remain and work with children. The owner of this blog knows my history better than you and he keeps me around. Furthermore, I would say he considers me a close friend.

Lee Ann take my advice, resign! I have previously written about your superiors screwing up and you’re irresponsible and arbitrary actions have made you my current target to write about. I have been in contact with our master who claims he has gotten people in your office terminated. You are an incompetent Jackhole and I’m coming for you. No one likes you. I’ve overcome more adversity that you can possibly throw at me. I was born despite my mother’s umbilical cord wrapped around my neck more times than I can count. I accomplish what I set my mind to perform. During the time that I played on my high school football team, we never lost; I have a ring to prove it, you Jackhole! I’m coming for you. Start checking the want ads, I heard your skillset works at Burger King.

Jake the Snake

Oh, I heard Lee Ann approved a member with pedophilia in his background…. stay tuned for my next blog.

My son, Really Right Jr, is taking American Sign Language (ASL) in school. As part of the class, he is expected to attend a number of outside deaf events each grading period. With a few weeks remaining in the grading period, he wanted to get his outside event completed during his Thanksgiving break.

We looked at a few options and decided to “stay within the lines” as they say here in Elk Grove and opted to attend the second service at Creekside Christian Church—the former First Baptist Church of Elk Grove.

FBC changed their name a few years ago and rebranded—this seems to be the fad in many Baptist churches. I spent over a decade of my life in and around Baptist churches so I thought I knew what I was in for but wow!

I have been on the campus of the church for various reasons in the past but never attended a service there before.

We arrived and took the first parking spot that we found which was far from the door. Parking is at a premium at this venue. We headed for the main building which was labeled as “Auditorium”. This is your first clue that this will not be a traditional worship experience. Why not a traditional name like church or sanctuary? Or even the more modern term worship center? Nope just auditorium.

Entering the auditorium building takes you into an outer room about the size of a large house. It was filled with a myriad of people. Near the entrance was a Christmas tree over 20 feet tall. Further in on the left was a generic Starbucks with gallons of various types of coffee and an assortment of donuts. The donuts were apparently for sale and not just given to members. I couldn’t tell if the coffee was complementary or for sale also. Many information tables were setup in the middle of the room. Of course the restrooms were located in this area also.

After navigating thru the chaos we finally made our way to the entrance of the auditorium proper. As expected, ushers were handing out bulletins to people as they entered. We let the usher know that our son was there to experience the deaf interpretation as a school assignment. He left his station and walked us to the area in the front where deaf and hearing impaired people were seated. Our son took a seat amongst the deaf folks and we found some open seats a few rows back.

The seats themselves were the kind that I really hate. They were padded but have interlocking hooks so all chairs in the row are linked together so you really get friendly with your neighbors whether you are comfortable doing that or not. I hate being cramped like a sardine. These seats make me feel like I’m in the lap of the person next to me. Think the stereotype of a Southwest Airlines flight.

After getting seated, we noted that there were no Bibles or hymnals available. We opened the bulletin and it was devoid of any information on the service order for that day. There was no kind of information on worship order or welcome to visitors or anything like that. It was devoid of song order, what we believe or similar doctrinal statement, and never even told us who would be preaching that morning. However, the back listed an extensive array of names that seemed to be mostly paid staff.

The other thing that you notice when you gaze around the room was the stage. It looked like a Hollywood stage for American Idol or some other television show with a little bit of a Christmas flavor added just to have an excuse for even more lights. There were two complete drum sets on the back left side of the stage which were both played simultaneously during the music, several singers, and guys playing electric guitars. A piano was on the right side but clearly missing was any semblance of a pulpit. On the back wall were large projection screens.

A few minutes after we were seated, the show began. The band cranked it up and started belting out songs that I had never heard anywhere before. Apparently if you go there a lot or happen to listen to “The Fish” radio station, you might know them.

Given the volume of the music, I can see why the church has hearing impaired people in the crowd. I thought the music was entertainment and not worshipful. By the second song, I was wondering if I had missed the popcorn line at the entrance. Maybe it was on the opposite side from the coffee. Anyway, as I watched the show, I was in the mood for a salty snack and cold ice tea. After a few more tunes, they took an offering and did another song.

Partway thru the show, a guy steps up to the microphone and starts talking. He made an announcement about the importance of a charity called Compassion International. And then he kept talking about Compassion. About 40 minutes later he finished talking about the charity. This was the sermon or done in place of it. I felt that I was at a live telethon and didn’t even know it.

Please understand that I like Compassion International and I’m happy whoever this guy is, does too, but typically I’ve seen stuff like this done at Sunday school or other non-worship time. Dare I say, even at concerts.

The program then continued and things really went strange… oh yes, there was more. Shortly after the presentation on Compassion International was finished yet another incongruity occurred. People were then invited to do Communion. Folks, I had a boatload of theological problems with how this was done.

First, the elements—bread and wine (or grape juice, not sure which)—were never blessed. There was no Scripture recited, no pray of thanksgiving, no “Do this in remembrance of me”, nothing. I’ve seen some fast and loose ways of doing Communion and felt a lack of reverence before but this one was just not there at all.

Second, the table was not fenced either verbally or in actuality. Folks this is a really big deal.

Communion was literally self-service and at a number of locations. I think Scripture makes it clear that there was one table where Jesus broke bread and said “Do this in remembrance of me.” Every Christian church service that I have heretofore attended has always had one table where Scripture and a prayer are said and then elements are distributed from there to the congregation. Jesus is The Bread and The Life. He is The Bread broken for you… This important symbolism of a foundational truth claim of the Bible was completely absent.

Also, Jesus’ body and blood were given for us. The symbolism of taking the elements out of unattended dishes where you literally help yourself instead of it being given to you by an ordained servant of Christ is just wrong. Yes I’ve seen unordained folks help in distribution but only after the bread and wine were consecrated.

Next, Scripture instructs us as to when to come to the table. We are told not to come unworthily. We come as sinners clothed with the righteousness of Christ but we are commanded to examine our hearts and be right with our brother before coming. No announcement (or even note in the bulletin) was made that you need to be baptized and not under church discipline to partake in Communion. Folks the biggest reason for someone to be ordained is to administer the Sacraments and these folks completely reneged on their responsibility. As I said before, no effort to fence the table at all.

Given the casual nature with which these guys approach the Sacraments, is it any wonder they dropped “Baptist” from their name. Baptists are well known not just for demanding that a person be baptized to receive Communion but also the method of baptism be immersion or it is not a valid one. “Believer’s baptism” is a real and unique theological term. The fact that it was never mentioned was frankly troubling given what I was expecting. Bread in a tray like Chick-fil-A mints and shot glasses of juice in unattended trays was deeply disturbing and irreverent. We didn’t go because we weren’t invited to and the elements were never blessed (consecrated). It was a mockery or parody of the Sacrament.

As I left the service, I was left wondering whether they held to anything other than good works as their “Christian” duty. Other than the pronouns used, what I witnesses could have passed for Methodist or any other group. Was this a clubhouse or a church? I couldn’t tell.

To recap:

• You have money changers in the lobby hawking coffee and donuts
• A “worship band” that drowns-out congregational singing instead of leading them
• A sermon that wasn’t (I like Compassion International so I can’t complain too much plus they prefaced the presentation by saying it was out of format)
• Self-serve Communion with absolutely zero clergy involvement

Folks I love most Christian rock music and listen to it often but I also feel that congregational worship is not an appropriate venue for this type of music. Rock is entertainment and I don’t go to church to be entertained. Entertainment is a musician saying look at me, while worship should be look at God. Confusing who is truly worthy is not helpful. I think of Christian rock as outreach not an up-reach.

But the real deal killer for me was the Communion service. I do believe that a Biblical alter call is going forward for Communion with God not visitors doing the sinner’s prayer and walking the aisle but the way Creekside did it was outside of the practices of the historic church.

Sorry, but I have zero interest in returning—except maybe if they actually have a good concert. I can honestly say that the sound system rocks and there’s plenty of free parking too.