Religion, Politics, and Culture: Explained and Defined
Here’s a Christmas Classic that many of our readers may not have heard. It appears to go back to at least 1965. Paul Harvey was the most well known conservative icon on radio until the ascension of Rush Limbaugh in the late 1980’s.
A transcript of the above and short biography of Paul Harvey can be found. here.
Have a Merry Christmas.
Joe Biden has offered an olive branch of sorts to some Republicans in the Trump Administration. Biden has offered to retain most of the Republican women currently employed in the White House for his first term.
When surprised reporters got wind of this news, they queried the presumptive President Elect. Biden replied that Trump’s White House has employed more women than any other Administration in U.S. history. Joe conceded that Trump’s women are a much better-looking lot than their Democrat counterparts. Turns out Republican women bathe regularly, have better smelling hair, dress sharper, and are more polite than the feminazis in his own Party.
When told of Biden’s comments, a shell-shocked Nancy Pelosi responded that Joe probably misspoke but further comment would have to wait because she was busy defending her position as Speaker.
An indignant Kamala Harris said there was no place for Republicans in her White House or her country. On a hot mike, she was also heard to reference sometime about “more soma” and “twenty-five … mints”
Most surprising of all was the praise given to Biden by radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh who praised Biden’s honesty, bipartisanship, and his confirmation of Undeniable Truth of Life #24.
Oh, Limbaugh’s Undeniable Truth of Life #24 Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women access to the mainstream of society.
In these troubling times, we are striving to Keep Hope Alive (and gainfully employed).
‘til next time…
While browsing television options in an Idaho hotel last week, I ran across this juxtaposition of programming.
Yep, the Crave channel is offering More Sex, Less Stress followed by Boy Scouts: The Sex Abuse Coverup.
Gee, what’s next Bill Clinton: the Monica Years followed by Jeffrey Epstein’s Weekend Getaway? No wonder people in our society are so confused about morality.
Yep, I just put several pieces of pop culture together in a way that makes sense to our current situation. Here’s the explanation and it’s so simple that even many low information folks—oh, I mean those that binge watch 24/7 cable news or listen to streaming music all day—can understand.
Please note that there are spoilers here for War of the Worlds so if you don’t know the ending, turn back now.
Whether in its more recent rendition with a voiceover from Morgan Freeman or the original radio play by H.G. Wells, its not the men but the microbes that defeat the alien invaders. Freeman’s voiceover can be summed up as this, men have inhabited this planet for a long time and as germs have mutated, our bodies have responded by strengthening our immune systems to cope with the hostile environment encountered in world that we live in.
Please note that I’m not really a Keeper Of Odd Knowledge (K.O.O.K.) but I just watched the show over the weekend for the first time, from start to finish. When I read an article linked by Joe Miller today, the connection was obvious.
The article is an explanation of herd immunity which scientists know exists in the current Covid-19 pandemic but heretofore lacked a good way of understanding. Many, including me, sensed there was herd immunity at work but where we erred was in thinking that you had to be infected and recover from Covid-19 to be immune. Well guess what? That assumption is wrong.
On the one hand, this virus seems to be extremely contagious and transmissible. On the other hand, it appears to have been around for a while, possibly in December, and didn’t kill too many people until super-spreading events in March.
On the one hand, the virus seems to kill a lot of vulnerable people for several weeks. But then it peaks after six weeks or so and nearly disappears a month or so later. We’ve seen the same curve in every country, almost as if it hits a brick wall and then runs out of steam.
But why is that the case? Most antibody tests show no more than 10%-15% of the population contain antibodies in a given area – 25% in the most extreme case of New York City. Why would the virus not continue cutting through the population like butter, as it did the first number of people who contracted the virus? The theory of a more ubiquitous cross-immunity from other coronaviruses would answer those questions and explain that invisible brick wall.
A theory of partial immunity, at least from helper T cells (if not killer T cells) could also explain why, on the one hand, once the virus gets into prisons, most test positive for it, but on the other hand, nearly all of them seem asymptomatic. The outcome of prisons as a fully confined and defined population could be a harbinger of what would theoretically happen if the entire world were exposed to the virus after it had already targeted the most vulnerable population. It’s possible that upwards of 95% would be asymptomatic, just like we are seeing in prisons.
Perhaps, it could also explain why there appears to be a massive gap in severity of the virus in Asia vs. Western countries. Asian countries are regularly exposed to coronaviruses.
BOMBSHELL STUDY: Could Half the Uninfected Population Already Be Partially Immune?
“In almost every context we’ve seen the epidemic grow, turn around and die away — almost like clockwork. Different countries have had different lockdown policies, and yet what we’ve observed is almost a uniform pattern of behavior which is highly consistent with the SIR model. To me that suggests that much of the driving force here was due to the build-up of immunity.”
Folks, as stated in this space previously, we should fear neither men nor microbes but only Almighty God. I’m not worried about Covid-19. The time and place of my death was appointed before the world began; all I can do is keep pressing on until my time is up. I suggest that you do likewise.
I decided to spend the last few days binge watching HBO’s Westworld. As my family will attest, I like a good Sci-Fi story, especially one that can explore questions about reality and human nature. In this post, I wish to share my overall comments on the program. I promise what you are about to read will not be a regurgitation of whatever IMDB may say about the show.
Westworld is just wrapping-up its third season on HBO. This is a television show with an A-list movie budget and has lots of special effects and CGI throughout.
Insiders tell The Hollywood Reporter the overall budget for the first season of the 10-episode project is in the $100 million range… Sources peg the budget for the 90-minute Westworld pilot alone in the $25 million range, including reshoots, with some costs rolled to episode two as parts of the series debut were moved out of the premiere. (For context: HBO scrapped the entire original Game of Thrones pilot, which had a price tag of $20 million.) The per-episode budget is said to be anywhere from $8 million to $10 million.
HBO’s ‘Westworld,’ With $100 Million Price Tag, Faces Huge Expectations
Created by husband-and-wife duo Jonathan Nolan (Person of Interest) and Lisa Joy and executive produced by J.J. Abrams, Westworld features a cast of A-listers including Anthony Hopkins as the head of an ultra-realistic amusement park where visitors come to live out their most outrageous desires. The cast also includes Evan Rachel Wood, James Marsden, Thandie Newton and Ed Harris. (Hopkins and Harris are said to have scored $175,000 per episode each, with the latter potentially having only a two-year deal.)
Folks, each episode of Westworld is like a part of a tent pole movie. It may harken back to the original movie with Yul Brenner but has been completely redone.
The good news is the J.J. Abrams is the director and not the one that wrote the story line, thus the show is expanded and reimagined but in ways that are more watchable than recent Star Wars and Star Trek movies which J.J. botched badly in my opinion. My complaint with J.J. is that his first act in any franchise is to blow-up the cannon (or mythology of the show) and do whatever he wants after that.
Johnathan Nolan and his group wrote the story arc which supposedly will end with the upcoming fourth season. Nolan has done many projects for movies and television. Some of the themes in Westworld, especially starting with the third season, are much like the back half of Person of Interest. In fact, the last episode that I watched prior to beginning to write this blog post included one of the recurring characters that appeared in Person of Interest. I will mention this program again later in this post.
FYI: both Westworld and Jurassic Park were novels by Michael Crichton.
I wish to mention a few of the characters in the show without spoiling any plot lines. Spoilers will come in a few minutes and with fair warning.
Anthony Hopkins portrays the creator of Westworld, Dr. Robert Ford. (Think Mr. Hammond from Jurassic Park.) Dr. Ford, and his now deceased partner, created and refined the androids that inhabit the amusement park. Since creative people need money to finance their ideas, this creates the opportunity for an evil corporation to voluntarily fund the Park in exchange for certain marketing opportunities. Dr. Ford is allowed to continue tinkering with his creations, as long as he keeps the Park running which he has done for 35 years now.
An android, or “Host” in this show, named Dolores played by Evan Rachel Wood is also an important and reoccurring character in the show. When you first meet her, she is clearly designated as Westworld’s damsel in distress.
Then of course is the legendary Man in Black—Yul Brenner in the original movie—is player by Ed Harris. This character is most certainly dark and evil, but I promised no spoilers… yet. I will say that his character has been given a complete rewrite by Nolan and company.
The show is lavish in every sense of the word. As I watched, I wondered where in the world would you put a place this big, certainly not a corn field in Iowa. If you recall the original movie, there were other theme parks in the same area besides Westworld. This is touched on occasionally in the HBO series.
This show has lots of violence and naked people. Most nude bodies are being reconditioned and prepared for return to the Park but since one of the main characters runs a brothel, there is some of that other stuff too. As the seasons go by, the nudity decreases in frequency. This program is not for children or teens either. Frankly, I don’t think they are ready for some of the questions that such a program can ask or the amount of mutilation and violence.
Folks, I don’t plan to give away the whole show, but from now on, I may be giving away some plot points as I continue.
I really want to like the show and do, to a point but… I have two gripes: continuity and philosophy.
Continuity is the flow of the story and is related to consistency both of plot and the visuals of the show.
Folks, how does a Park like this even exist? No, not the technology but the economics. The amount of damage inflicted on the androids, and their subsequent repair, would not make such a park cost effective, even in a fictional world. As much as each android costs and considering the number killed in a single episode—such as the origin story of the Man in Black—I think the expense would outright bankrupt Disney, Apple, and Microsoft combined and the Man in Black is just one guy causing mayhem in an amusement park that has seen 4 million visitors since opening 35 years ago. Seems like by the time you meet him in Westworld, the Man in Black has killed everybody in the park at least once.
Then there are all the underground access points to the park which all seem to be accessed by… walking? No way. Except for elite security guys, nobody seems to have horseless carriages to run them from point A to B.
How many floors is the main facility? Also, how come nobody knows about all the auxiliary labs in the Park full of expensive equipment. Also, if the top floor is outdoors (top of the mesa), how is it that the oldest part of the facility is in the bottom floors farthest from the surface. Why does a multibillion-dollar complex in the desert have water leaks everywhere and power but somehow no standing water or working electric lights? I kept waiting for Sigourney Weaver’s Alien or Jonesy the cat to jump out every time somebody went into the bowels of the complex and started poking around.
Lastly the park is big enough to have pine trees, deserts, snowstorms, Mt. Fuji, and jungle. No effort to explain is ever made. Like much in the show, it just is, and viewers are supposed to believe.
As far as technology goes, when is any computer hardware or software still considered cutting edge 35 years after it was created? We’re talking in terms of computing power and artificial intelligence. Yet, in Season 3 we see no robots that could pass for human—even at a glance—except for the ones from Westworld. What happened to imitation and flattery? Or Moore’s Law. In our world, after 35 years, whatever people had seen at Westworld would have been copied like crazy and due to innovation, the old technology—both hardware and software—would be obsolete. The other out the writers could take to explain this away was that the technology was outlawed but that option is not mentioned in the show.
Where are backup datacenters and sources of energy for the Park? When they finally “lift the curtain” on park operations as the show goes on, they just ignore that stuff or get it really wrong. As much as the Park and its technology costs and they have no redundant systems? Destroy one bank of computers and I’m supposed to believe all the data is gone forever with no backups. Yet, this is the cornerstone of much of the action in Seasons 2 and 3.
The computers that are created by the opponent in Season 3 are big blackballs with reds lights suspended in the air—one is hanging publicly in the middle of his headquarters building and the other in a warehouse. Seems like using an RPG or the EMP weapon could have ended the whole plotline and saved HBO millions in storytelling.
The story writers just bombard you with stuff and hope you don’t dwell on it too much as they move to the next shiny object. I guess this is ok for television writing but with a blockbuster movie budget, it seems like Nolan and Abrams would pay more attention to continuity.
Lastly, each season is full of time jumps that make following the story purposely difficult. This is done in order to introduce surprises to the viewers but don’t let the show keep running if you take a potty break or you may be asking when is it.
Folks, I’ve saved this section for last and feel most passionately about it. I would like to grab Mr. Nolan by the shirt collar and tell him to wake-up. While many of the right questions are asked in various places in the program, the answers offered are not only insufficient but totally wrong.
Note: From here on I beat-up on Nolan but darn it, this is more of the same worldview I get from every other program originating from entertainment corporations. Why is it that in movies and television, every corporation is evil except the one that brought us the movie/TV show that somehow deserves every dime that they can earn from royalties and ticket sales?
On the HBO website for the program, Westworld claims that they “will explore questions about the nature of our reality, free will and what makes us human.”
How can Jonathan Nolan do not one but two television shows on artificial intelligence and the question of what it means to be alive and not believe in a Creator? Talk about a logical disconnect! The thesis of all the elites in Nolan’s Westworld is that we are here as the result of not one mistake, but a whole series of them. His characters espouse evolution by chaos theory in a program dedicated to exploring the idea of artificial life designed and created by humans.
In a story with the scope of Westworld, I can understand different characters believing different ways about God and origins just like the real world but in Westworld all the discussions—more like monologues—are all from the same point of view no matter which character has the dialogue. Ed Harris and Anthony Hopkins go on ad infinitum about no purpose to our existence which is simply the result of errors. In these monologues, we also get a dose of Marxism claiming that those who believe in God are the unenlightened, ignorant, stupid, masses who use the opiate of theism to stay ignorant of the world around them. Those of us that believe in God are just waiting for the slaughter.
In Jurassic Park, we hear Jeff Goldblum’s character Malcolm espouse the virtues of evolution but in the book, Malcolm goes on the mock the arrogance of humans that think they control the planet. Malcolm opposed the idea of the park tinkering with genetics. As you read the passage, it is clear that at this point in the book, Michael Crichton is both providing a warning about what follows and also giving you his opinion at the same time.
In contrast, after watching three Seasons of Westworld, there is zero indication that Nolan is using science to teach a parable about the hubris of mankind. Thus far, Nolan is just a storyteller with a big budget. To me, it’s like Nolan—thru his characters—is having a tantrum and thinks if he yells loud enough then he won’t have to listen to God’s voice. However, I keep holding out a tiny measure of hope that he sneaks in “a still small voice” by the resolution of season 4 but I’m skeptical.
Instead of God, Westworld introduces the idea that a simple algorithm can be discovered to predict all human behavior. Frankly, as the idea is developed, it seems like L. Ron Hubbard is the unsung hero of this tale. The androids get the algorithm and can then predict the entire course of a human’s life down to the words coming out of their mouths in any given situation. Oh, and who they will marry, how they will die, etc. Several times thus far, one-character hands another a piece of paper or a computer pad with the dialogue typed on it before the other character has even spoken the lines. The other character is amazed that their life is that predictable.
Person of Interest had “the machine” versus Samaritan, likewise in Westworld, host Delores and her allies versus evil trillionaire’s IA computer. The trillionaire wants to control everyone on the planet and anyone that falls outside the parameters that he can control is eliminated—after they are given the obligatory opportunity for conformity at a reeducation facility.
The faction of the Hosts has the algorithm from Westworld and thus have the answers to the human condition but limited resources. They desire to remake the world of humans and dominate them—how has not been explained other than they want to replace the current order with something else. Dolores at one point did proclaim that she wanted to burn down the human’s world. I think this story sounds like a thinly veiled version of Scientology bringing salvation to both men and machines, but we won’t know until they roll-out Season 4.
Just so you know, Nolan is the product of a nominally Roman Catholic upbringing and he has the reputation of using colorful metaphors when interviewed. However, at a casual search, I can’t tie Nolan to the scientology mafia that has dominated Hollywood for the last few decades. (John Travolta, Tom Cruise, etc.)
I wish to circle back to the issues that the show promises to explore, the “…nature of our reality, free will and what makes us human.”
Westworld claims to explore reality but rejects that we are made in God’s image. They have reduced man to a predetermined and even fatalistic organism that just runs in their “loop.” The hosts deny that man has any free will but the AI faction thinks that while man is just following his programming, every once in a while, free will might actually be exercised by an individual; however, such behavior is rare and might even be a bad thing.
Why can’t Nolan and company allow that we have a Creator? Even Richard Dawkins, the supposedly great leader and advocate of evolution, doesn’t really believe it is a sufficient explanation. When cornered, Dawkins finally resorted to saying that life on Earth is due to seeding of the planet by aliens and not evolution. In other words, he will accept any intelligence from anywhere as long as it’s not God. Find the video of Dawkins in Ben Stein’s Expelled (2008) if you don’t believe me.
I’m not demanding that Nolan agree 100 percent with me, just that he show a little humility when dealing with such issues. Men of various faiths and cultures have debated these ideas since the beginning and for Nolan to summarily toss it all aside and say a pox on all of you is disingenuous. By rejecting that God is our creator and we his creatures, Nolan lacks any basis for evaluating reality.
Having erred on the first point, he then falls short of understanding free will and what it is to be human. Truth is most people can’t wrap their minds around these ideas. So, while we might be entertained by the sandbox Jonathan Nolan is playing in, we will end up with just another entertainment show that ultimately tells us more about what Hollywood thinks than a critique of the dystopian future that he has created. Nolan may think he is making a veiled commentary on our world—which is what all good science fiction has been in the past—but I’m doubtful whether it will hold up well over time. Westworld is worth a look but I’m not sure it has enough in it to warrant many repeat visits to the Park. Maybe when the tale is completed, I will change my mind but right now it’s not encouraging.
Season 1 & 2 are 10 episodes each while season 3 is 8 episodes, the last of which will be broadcast in the next few hours.
We take a break from the coronavirus meltdown to bring you one heck of a story out of Florida involving former Tallahassee Mayor and Governor nominee Andrew Gillum.
Police swept the room and found 3 bags of crystal meth. Gillum was allowed to leave and return to his residence…I guess he pulled the “I’m a former governor candidate card” many of us can never use. Any other citizen gets bracelets put around their hands and escorted to the “blue roof inn”. But wait there is more….the man who was coked out of his mind on methamphetamines? He is a 30 year old gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that) male escort. He had a profile on Rentmen.com his name is Travis Dyson.
Here is where it gets far worse for Gillum. He released this statement Friday morning ““I was in Miami last night for a wedding celebration when first responders were called to assist one of my friends. While I had too much to drink, I want to be clear that I have never used methamphetamines,” he said. “I apologize to the people of Florida for the distraction this has caused our movement.”
However, this statement from his male escort friend says otherwise “Gillum was too drunk to speak to the police when they arrived at the scene,” documents say. Speaking to the Miami New Times, Dyson said that Gillum did not mention attending a wedding. In his statement, Gillum referred to Dyson as a “friend.” Dyson said that he and Gillum had been friends since last spring. Dyson told the website, “I personally was not celebrating a wedding. I don’t know if [Gillum] was in town for a wedding. He did not mention that.” I think most would kindly admit they were there for a wedding to the friends they “rented by the hour.”
Ok…so the troll has been wound up…. GET HIM!!!!!!!!
One thing I know about this guy, he did it for the entire world to see. He confirmed it. It’s a fact. It’s not subjective. He cannot argue it…Andrew Gillum BLOWS! When you ran for Governor, you lectured us in our ear….while you were taking it in the rear!!!! Is it bad that the first thing I thought of when I saw this story was I hoped it included Anderson Cooper and Don Lemon (his 2 CNN co-workers) in hope this was like some perverse love Oreo? Democrat politicians have a checkered and long record with threesomes, just Google Chris Dodd and Ted Kennedy; their favorite “sandwich” was them plus a random waitress in between them, usually after closing time.
Somewhere former DC Mayor Marion Berry is smiling in heaven.
God, what a liar you are Gillum, saying the meth wasn’t yours. 3 men, 3 bags…. oh wait, that’s not Common Core math, never mind. How come you didn’t use the excuse it was sugar? And you needed to add it to your Cuban Roast Coffee? Don’t worry young Andrew, a similar situation happened to failed candidate Stacy Abrams in Georgia…. oh wait, that was Crisco and Pixie Sticks!
We interrupt this transmission to bring you a coronavirus update…. WAIT WHAT? Get the **** outta here with your update! I’ve got a case of Corona too, it’s in my fridge!!!!!!!
Andrew Gillum welcome to the big leagues; however, in today’s media you must prove your innocence, just like Trump colluded with Russia, you colluded with a homosexual male escort. Sorry one of those things is true. Ok, Ok I will cut him some slack, people have gone to jail for drugs when it was actually just donut glaze or bird droppings, I say we give it a day or two. Can you just see it? Three gay men in an orgy eating donut glaze…. oh God I’m going to puke. Asking for a friend though, could this be a new Two and a Half Men show rebirth?????
UPDATE: Marion Berry just put down his crack pipe in heaven, even he is in awe.
How ironic would it have been for Florida to have a meth head governor, along with a first lady, and first “side piece?” Even better, Meth…. hotel…. Florida…. multiple dudes, the new Democrat Party has a few soldiers on the front lines. Even better wait….Is this guy the Black Ed Buck? (Two African-American men have been discovered dead in Buck’s West Hollywood home since 2017 due to drug overdoses. Several reports indicated that Buck had a history of bringing African-American men to his house, where he would reportedly inject them with crystal methamphetamine for sexual gratification. In January 2019, a coalition of 50 civil rights organizations called for law enforcement to investigate the matter. On September 17, 2019, Buck was arrested and charged with three counts of battery causing serious injury, administering methamphetamine, and maintaining a drug house. Buck is a white major Democrat donor in California, where the above arrests are barely considered illegal by the way.
I do actually feel bad; if only Andrew was elected governor he could afford the pure stuff not the knock off crystal meth. Frankly a politician should have at least splurged for some cocaine. Here is a photo of Gillum with Obama, Obama is famous for doing blow and bragging about it….fear not Mayor Gillum you are also famous for doing a different kind of blow! It’s funny, I looked up a photo of your “friend” and wow talk about toxic masculinity…. how will you ever recover from this one? I can only imagine what Radical Madcow and Fidel O’Donnell on MSNBC will think of you now. Gillum if I was you, I would get out in front of this news ASAP, because I don’t think you want it to stay behind you too long…or am I wrong?????
Actually Andrew, on second thought, I think Joe Biden should name you Secretary of the Drug Enforcement Agency, looking at your record you seem to be an obvious choice! Folks let’s not worry about his wife too much, rumor has it she was in a room 2 doors down with a bottle of champagne, some cocaine, and her own male escort! Guess the family that stays together, plays together, or at least enjoys the same recreational activities.
Folks in a bit of seriousness, Gillum is your typical hypocrite, telling you what to do and what is right whilst living a second life. Gillum is married, and has 3 children. Gillum likely can say goodbye to any political career for a while.
A couple other trolls got in on the fun as well. Tweets are below. Definitely no Hope for this guy…. but maybe there is still HOPE for me????
You may now resume panicking as you continue watching the 24/7 coverage of the Toilet Paper Apocalypse…
Florida police arrest Major League Baseball player at Dollar Tree for a solo “home run.” Here are the details:
Toronto Blue Jays catcher Reese McGuire has been charged with indecent exposure after exposing himself in a Florida parking lot Friday, authorities say.
The 24-year-old athlete was arrested in Dunedin, Florida — where the Blue Jays spring training facility is located — after police responded to a 2:07 p.m. call of a man exposing himself while sitting inside an SUV parked outside of a Dollar Tree store, according to the report from Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office.
Blue Jays Catcher Reese McGuire Arrested in Florida for Exposing Genitals
That arrest headline literally reads like a Mad Lib from my youth, that didn’t actually happen, did it?
Worst part is, its as bad as it sounds. Like you’re caught stroking your salami, in a parking lot, near a Dollar Tree, in your Mercedes, watching porn. Like, that’s a wild move! If he did this in the comfort of his own home it’s not a crime at all, but instead, he does this in front of the store! Yikes. Can you imagine the 911 call?
Hope Hicks Returns to White House as a Senior Advisor: Speaking of stimulating, the Troll could not be happier about this one. Only one problem, she is now a senior at 31? She still looks great by the way!
Hope Hicks, formerly President Donald Trump’s most trusted and longest serving aide, is expected to return to the administration in the coming weeks, sources familiar with the matter tell ABC News.
Hicks, who departed in early 2018, will return in the coming weeks as a senior adviser reporting to Jared Kushner, the president’s son-in-law. Her official title will be counselor to the president.
Hope Hicks returning to Trump White House as senior adviser
“There is no one more devoted to implementing President Trump’s agenda than Hope Hicks,” Mr. Kushner said in a statement. “We are excited to have her back on the team.”
Hey, stay away from her Kushner! You have Ivanka, and she is another favorite of Troll, so let’s have a truce, shall we! I’m more than excited she is back!
Jarrold Nadler was skeptical: “I’m not thrilled the underwear model is returning to the White House.” Ummm how would you know Jarrold? You dumb humpty dumpty… just fall off the wall already. That being said however, I would love to see her work. I’m a huge fan by the way… and I’m going to IM the Trumpster to see if Hope is single…Because, I need Hope in my life!!!!!!!
UPDATE: Jennifer Aniston, I call her Jen by the way, is not handling this well, posting this photo of herself. It is pure jealousy, but it’s ok. I may circle back to Jen if no Hope exists.
The Troll
By order of the Blog Father, I was sent on a special assignment. I literally went to hell and back (not with Gordon Ramsey) to bring you the following interview with recently deceased Iranian General, Qasem Soleimani, henceforth referred to as “Q”.
Trolls are known to live under bridges but with the right medicine man, we can even bridge between worlds. Anyway, with a little assist from The Chief, I descended into hell, and sat down for a hard-hitting interview that only the Troll can accomplish. We touched on many topics, and I can say I may have a future as a journalist! Here is the interview.
Troll: General, how are you?
Q: Good mourning western maggot.
Troll: How is life down here in Hell?
Q: It is so-so, I met some great people; Hitler, Stalin, Mussolini, Kim Jong Il, Saddam Hussain, and more. However, tell those idiot Democrats that I killed hundreds of thousands! It’s hard to make friends down here when they call me an innocent martyr!
Troll: How are the 72 virgins?
Q: They are all young boys! The only one happy down here is that Jeffrey Epstein! I never knew he was a Muslim! Lots of suicide bombers mad at me, telling me this isn’t what they signed up for!
Troll: You speak to Epstein often?
Q: Yes, he didn’t kill himself, he told me it was Hillary Clinton.
Troll: What was the last thing that went through your mind the day of your death?
Q: Well…a missile! Dumb infidel, but before that…I wondered why that idiot Abu Mohandis set his snapchat to public! That’s the reason I’m here!
Troll: Any topics off limits?
Q: None…I’m already in hell, can’t get much worse.
Troll: What was behind that 4.9 Earthquake near your nuclear power plant?
Q: Michael Moore was going to parachute in and assist us against Trump… apparently his chute didn’t open. The poor infidel. He bounced all the way to Pakistan.
Troll: We recently arrested “Jabba the Jihadi” what can you tell us about him?
Q: You caught him? Damn he was the nuclear weapon we had been working on for years to violate the UN deal! His gravitational pull and size could have wiped out San Francisco… would have ensured Trump’s re-election!
Troll: So, we caught a mastermind?
Q: Yes, and you got lucky it would have taken 15-20 missiles to destroy him.
Troll: What about the Iranian students refusing to stomp on the US and Israeli flags?
Q: Its ok, college students in California will do that instead.
Troll: What’s Saddam like?
Q: I was bored and suggested we play hangman, he was not happy.
Q: In addition, Gaddafi has cat fished me on Tindr twice… what kind of man pretends to be a goat! Man he pulled the wool over my eyes again.
Troll: I thought you would learn your lesson after matching with a missile on Tindr?
Q: Funny, watch your back little man…I can order a strike on your wife Hope Hicks at any time.
Troll: But you have no fingers?
Q: Point taken.
Troll: Who are the oddest folks in hell?
Q: Jim Jones keeps trying to buy me drinks… sorry buddy, I know too much about you. Also Ted Kennedy wtf, always offering me to ride with him in his Oldsmobile. Dude is always talking about sandwiches and offshore drilling.
Troll: Anything else you wish to pass on to the outside world?
Q: I have told Khameni I think the infidels are preparing a strike, if they drop that fat bastard Chris Christie on Tehran all will be lost. Oh, and Ted Bundy… he killed way more than the 30 he confessed to, he was inducted into the Hall of Flame here last week! That’s our highest recognition for people who never served in government. There’s a special place in Hell for us. Oh, and we have reduced the number of targets in the USA, we have discovered there is no intelligent life in Hollywood, Portland, or Seattle. And besides they like us there.
Troll: Anything else on the way out?
Q: I tried pork… my it is good, and bacon is amazing, pass along to the Muslims to try it! Also, they are building a skyscraper here for all the Clintons… they will live in infamy here! Also tell that Brock Turner kid, we are all waiting to kick his A** here in hell for what he did. Also pass on, we plan to kill the Democrats last! Also, does Bernie Sanders rub a balloon on his head before he appears in public… wow his hair is wild. Reminds me of the flames down here. Also, you say it’s the greatest invention since electricity all the time… why is this?
That Nancy Pelosi could not be more ugly! Sadly, paper bags don’t hold-up well down here so I think she will be in for an eternity of lonely Saturday nights.
Troll: Thanks for the info, any additional interviews planned?
Q: Yes, I am becoming a MSNBC contributor next week. Since the dead overwhelmingly vote Democrat, it only seems right.…. I plan to ask that Rachael Maddow if you hate white men so much why are you trying so hard to look like one?
Troll: Thanks again
Q: May Allah bless you with eternal life, also I wish you well in your three some with Hope Hicks and Jennifer Aniston! That white dress was really something.
Troll
Yep, no way around it, I’m a member of the clan. I could say that its my son’s fault; after all, I send him to one of those conservative, religious schools where most of the teachers believe in a literal six day creation, but I know that, in the final analysis, I’m responsible for my own actions.
Truth be told, my son was talked into joining the clan by friends at school. Maybe idle hands (or minds) are the devil’s workshop. Anyway, he was persuaded that the benefits of clan membership were such that he couldn’t pass up the opportunity. Of course, he gave me the line about all my friends are doing it.
After a few months, he decided to recruit me as well. I was surprised. First, membership required only a few clicks to get to the Google store and download the app by which we all communicate. I never would have thought you could join the clan via Google but sure enough, it was so. Truly everything can be had on the Internet if you know where to look. Second, the price to sign-up was negligible… at least at first.
Please understand that I love my son and want to be part of his life. Thus, joining the clan was not because I want to hurt others but because I want to be part of his life; hurting others came later.
You could ask me who the other members of our clan are, but I honestly don’t know. Online, everyone hides behind pseudonyms. Think of the clan as a cell where nobody knows all the members, but each works in concert for the benefit of all. Hurting people online isn’t like being a Troll—where words are said that are harsh—instead, we specialize in targeted action. One goal of the clan is effectively dominating our opponents. We literally live to humiliate and destroy them. To minimize retaliation, we limit our online activity and take turns pummeling others only to fade into the ether to rise another day.
Our cell has a code name that changes every once in a while, the change helps us to cover our tracks. Lately we have been calling ourselves the “Crusaders.”
I have been elevated to a co-leader of the group—I’m sure the fact that I have more resources to contribute is part of the reason. Its more responsibility than I was planning on, but I’m committed to seeing this thru, at least to the end of the school year. Teenagers don’t have long attention spans but at least I’m with them right now. For better or ill, I’m the only parent that really knows what their sons are doing in their spare time. Joining the clan is not for everyone but I really want to support my son as he tries to find his path in life.
If you’re curious about the clan click here for more information.
by Chief
Blog Father did a really good job on Nextdoor. I want to elaborate just a touch further on the topic of message boards on the internet. Nextdoor was actually a useful source for the first couple years I was on it. As a new homeowner in a mostly starter home neighborhood, I wanted to know the goings on around my new digs. There was good information on it initially, crime, new stores, garage sales, giveaways…then it all changed.
The night I cancelled the app, it seemed like all of Elk Grove was chiming in about a neighbor (nowhere near my house) whose camera picked up a couple of youths seeming to be casing the neighborhood. The back and forth among adult men and women was atrocious, allegations were thrown, assumptions were being made…..yikes. It was all the normal bars; are you sure they were casing? Why didn’t you do something about it? Were they Black? Mexican?
The only redeeming quality for the site was you had to post under your actual name, not an internet pseudonym, (more on this later), and it had the neighborhood where you lived listed as well. It devolved into neighbors playing Salem Witch Trial type gotcha’s on one another. My neighbor is playing music too loud! Look out for this truck because my neighbor’s kid drives too fast! How dare you let your dog off the leash to play fetch in the park! I’m off the app, I see it hasn’t changed and I’m glad I waste no more time on it.
Now on to something far worse, comment sections and message boards, the free type. This is the worst of the worst. Anyone can make a free account, it takes only minutes, and most create several free accounts. From there…well, let hell rain on everything. Whatever you think about Trump on Twitter, it’s tame compared to what these folks post. Check them out yourself. Yahoo.com, almost any message board, online newspaper, forum, you name it. Heck you should see what we get in our spam filter on this blog. If you insist on checking out my claim yourself then I recommend showering afterwards because it is a sewer in there. Right, left, middle, young, old, it’s almost all retirees and non-stop cable watchers, but boy is it bad. I’m positive not a single normal person posts there, it’s just a bunch of hot take machines arguing back and forth about the dumbest stuff.
In conclusion, sadly, this is where we are as a country now. You can be totally anonymous on a message board and spew your filth all over the internet unchecked. It gives the unemployed, retired, and those who are just not bright an avenue to feel important. I agree with William, they just hit F5 on their desktop all day looking for a fight to pick or an argument to make. But I guess to some, it gives power to the few to try to have influence over us all. These folks do to the Internet what the homeless do to San Francisco’s sidewalks. Sad state of affairs we live in now.
Chief
