Mayor Pete Buttigieg, which is apparently pronounced Boot Edge Edge…I prefer Booty Judge due to obvious reasons but I digress. Ignoring his obvious homosexual tendencies (as in Seinfeld not that there’s anything wrong with that) he is a confirmed sociopath and not electable. Allow me to make my case.
Exhibit A: How he eats a cinnamon roll.
Just look at that, that’s a crime against humanity. He apparently unrolls his cinnamon roll like a crazy person, and proceeds to cut it up, and eat it like a chicken wing. Literally, he is not electable. Almost as bad as his next culinary fallacy. I still recall President Donald J Trump telling his young son Baron, cut up the pancake and take small bites while on the campaign trail, apparently Booty Judge took it literally.
Exhibit B: Mayor Pete likes to mix salsa and ranch together to form a secret sauce.
Pictured: Most Reverend Alfredo Sharpton and Mayor Pete praying their sacrifice may be accepted to which ever god they believe in. Sharpton had just washed the blood of his hands from a local BLM demonstration, Mayor Pete fresh off filling the number 2 hole.
Seriously what kind of crazy person mixes salsa and ranch together? Only a completely out of touch Mayor. He literally said this last week:
“I realize this might become one of my most controversial statements,” says the first openly gay Presidential candidate. “But you gotta understand, where I come from, we’re not purists about these things. Obviously, salsa is salsa and ranch is ranch, but if somebody’s gonna mix ‘em up, I’m not above dipping a tortilla chip in it and enjoying the mix of flavors.”In most controversial stance yet, Mayor Pete comes out in favor of mixing ranch and salsa
Umm so I guess were calling that piece of genitalia a tortilla chip now? Wild move.
In closing, this guy is guilty of pre-crime your honor. Let’s arrest him for something before we read about him have a ton of bodies buried in his back yard. What kind of crazy person eats their cinnamon roll like a chicken wing, and who the heck thinks salsa and ranch together makes a decent combination?