Mini Mike’s Millions

Just a quick note on Mike Bloomberg’s campaign for President. Mike has reportedly spent close to half a billion dollars (~$500 million for folks in Rio Linda) yet I have not seen a single ad for his campaign. Not on radio, television, or the Internet! How can this be? Where is all that money going?

Truthfully, I think the answer is that Bloomberg’s pockets are being picked by his political consultants. It’s not unusual that consultants get as much as 15 percent of whatever the candidate spends. Bloomberg is also paying extra for media buys since many people want to advertise and there are only so many slots. In economic terms, demand is higher than supply so the supplier can pick their price for their product. As a result, “Mini” Mike is not getting much bang for his buck.

While I vote Conservative, I’m registered as having No Party Preference (NPP)—the second largest political block in California—yet I have not heard from any candidates other than President Trump. The County Clerk has offered me the opportunity to vote in one of four party primaries—none of which was Republican—so in theory I could vote for “Mini” Mike, or Crazy Bernie. About 30 percent of California is NPP and yet nobody is reaching out to us. I vote in every election so frankly I’m surprised.

Thus far, Bloomberg is not getting his money’s worth; however, there is one area that I expect he may drop even more funds. I think Mike will make candidates an offer that many can’t refuse; namely, I look for him to offer to pay campaign debts of those that drop out in exchange for their endorsement of his campaign and pledge of their delegates. I will qualify this idea by acknowledging that this might hinge on the outcome of Super Tuesday.

For a guy that’s supposed to be this big shot billionaire, Bloomberg is more out of touch than Biden or anyone else. He also has a deficit in charisma and personality and no amount of money can fix that.

H. Ross Perot–a Presidential candidate that was all ears

Bloomberg really makes me miss Ross Perot. Perot was entertaining to watch and had a much larger following than Mike ever will.

Mayor Pete is a Sociopath: It’s Obvious

By Troll

Mayor Pete Buttigieg, which is apparently pronounced Boot Edge Edge…I prefer Booty Judge due to obvious reasons but I digress. Ignoring his obvious homosexual tendencies (as in Seinfeld not that there’s anything wrong with that) he is a confirmed sociopath and not electable. Allow me to make my case.

Exhibit A: How he eats a cinnamon roll.

Just look at that, that’s a crime against humanity. He apparently unrolls his cinnamon roll like a crazy person, and proceeds to cut it up, and eat it like a chicken wing. Literally, he is not electable. Almost as bad as his next culinary fallacy. I still recall President Donald J Trump telling his young son Baron, cut up the pancake and take small bites while on the campaign trail, apparently Booty Judge took it literally.

Exhibit B: Mayor Pete likes to mix salsa and ranch together to form a secret sauce.

Pictured: Most Reverend Alfredo Sharpton and Mayor Pete praying their sacrifice may be accepted to which ever god they believe in. Sharpton had just washed the blood of his hands from a local BLM demonstration, Mayor Pete fresh off filling the number 2 hole.

Seriously what kind of crazy person mixes salsa and ranch together? Only a completely out of touch Mayor. He literally said this last week:

“I realize this might become one of my most controversial statements,” says the first openly gay Presidential candidate. “But you gotta understand, where I come from, we’re not purists about these things. Obviously, salsa is salsa and ranch is ranch, but if somebody’s gonna mix ‘em up, I’m not above dipping a tortilla chip in it and enjoying the mix of flavors.”

In most controversial stance yet, Mayor Pete comes out in favor of mixing ranch and salsa

Umm so I guess were calling that piece of genitalia a tortilla chip now? Wild move.

In closing, this guy is guilty of pre-crime your honor. Let’s arrest him for something before we read about him have a ton of bodies buried in his back yard. What kind of crazy person eats their cinnamon roll like a chicken wing, and who the heck thinks salsa and ranch together makes a decent combination?

The Troll